In this issue

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review August 11, 2008 / 10 Menachem-Av 5768


By Mona Charen

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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | They told me — back in the days when I had three little boys ages 4 and under — that while those early years might be tumultuous and exhausting, the payoff for crazed mothers and fathers comes in the teenage years. Then, while parents of girls are being whipsawed by operatic mood swings and battling over tube tops and short shorts, we parents of boys would be kicking back and enjoying life. I am here to report that it's true!

Okay, not entirely. David was moody and irritable for pretty much his entire 13th year and while he has now reached the sunny uplands of 14, he still has his moments. Jon, 16, has developmental disorders of various kinds so that no age is without challenges. But for the most part, the teen years here are actually — and one doesn't want to tempt the evil eye but — fun.

Well, of course, as the parent of a teenager you do have to have a sense of humor about certain things — like socks. They either fail to wear them when they should, or leave dirty ones in places they should not. They are heedless of their appearance and submit only reluctantly to daily ablutions. They consume prodigious amounts of food but regard two stalks of broccoli as a huge portion. When their hair is falling over their foreheads and tumbling down over the eyes to somewhere near the nostrils, they pronounce it "too short." And they have a peculiar sense of time. After three hours on the computer they will wail plaintively, "I just got on!" But after six minutes of practicing the trumpet or clarinet they will affirm that they spent a half-hour.

And yes, as the mother of a music-obsessed 14-year-old, I do yield radio control to whoever has first called "shotgun" in the car and thus am subjected to more heavy metal than a middle-aged woman should be expected to endure. Did you know that there are genres of heavy metal? Oh, yes. There's hair metal and death metal and thrash metal and God knows what else. I once asked David whether every song amounted to its own genre. He was dismissive. David is very quick on the trigger. He knows my views and standards and after a year and a half of listening to heavy metal in the car, I don't think I've heard a single swear word.

But enduring heavy metal is an investment because this boy also loves Rachmaninoff, Beethoven and Rimsky-Korsakov. We split our time between the rock and classical channels. David can play Hummel and Haydn on the trumpet, and after spending three glorious weeks at Interlochen music camp this year he returned appreciating opera, dance, and even (his mother's skepticism notwithstanding) Mahler. If I can listen to Metallica and Rush for David's sake, I can certainly give Gustav another go.

Ben, at 12, is not technically a teenager yet, but that hardly matters since Ben is one of those people who was born mature. This is not to say he's solemn. Quite the contrary. Listening to the news on the car radio the other day, the announcer intoned, "Next, is Bill Clinton a racist?" "He can't be," quipped Ben, "he's the first black president." I guess it's possible that adolescence will transform this smiling prankster (I got an alert on my PDA recently that read "Buy Ben presents") into a brooding shadow at least some of the time. But it's hard to imagine. He has the gift of buoyancy, a talent for keeping busy (most underrated in this screen-dependent age), and too much impishness to remain morose for long.

I so admire parents who are more rigid and disciplined that I. Certainly for three boys a bit more martinet would not go amiss. (My husband is better, but he works long hours.) And I do look at teenage girls who seem to keep their notebooks so tidy and their hair combed and their permission slips signed and think — it's a different world.

But I'm not complaining. I get in my car and the GPS spits out directions to our favorite sushi restaurant and I think "Ben!" After haggling with David about practice time, he finally puts the trumpet to his lips and out comes real music, beautiful music. Jonathan is learning the bass guitar, helping out with the younger kids at synagogue, and earning pocket money by gardening, cleaning, and caring for the four animals in our household. He's so contented when he's working hard, and that is no small thing in this world.

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