In this issue
April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Dec. 21, 2009 / 3 Teves 5770

Business as Usual (on Tiger Woods)

By Jackie Mason & Raoul Felder

http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Tiger Woods withdrawing from golf to work on his family problems was a brilliant maneuver. He went from a place where any person from pundit to straphanger who was able to put together a cohesive sentence tried to outdo each other in efforts to revile him, but now root for him to succeed. America loves second acts and soon the clamor for him to return to golf will be deafening.

Initially, Woods violated P.R. 101 — you must get ahead of the story not like Woods, bleeding day after day in the nation's media, becoming the subject of late night TV comics, and standing by helplessly as paramour after paramour popped up. His, what charitably could be called, love life became like a bakery: "Take a number. Next."

Woods makes (or made) approximately $117 million a year from golf, but $100 million of that came from endorsements. These will ultimately be toast — all of them. From what the ladies in question explained, he could not even become a spokesman for condoms.

His surviving endorsements could not drop him now since they are in the midst of advertising campaigns, not to mention possible backlash from still-remaining fans, and there is, of course, the folk myth of not hitting a guy when he is down (tactically, it is probably the best time). The companies will wait until the termination of the contracts — nowadays sports endorsement contracts are of short duration and they all have moral clauses — elsewise they would face the wrath of pious shareholders from the mid-west (or wherever piety dwells) at annual shareholder meetings.

Letter from JWR publisher Woods tried to buy peace, by upping the ante on another front — his wife — to buy her silence, but he miscalculated the serial appearances of different women (one wonders when he got the time to play golf). But Jackie Mason explained that Clinton could spend 20 minutes committing adultery, and he had the rest of the day to be President.

People fail to understand that an adulterer's business is adultery. It is not an addiction and not a sickness; it is a character flaw. Doctors tell alcoholics trying to break the habit to remember how ill and sick they felt the morning after. Adulterers feel fine the morning after. They had exercise and adulation and no conscience to trouble them.

The future: Mrs. Woods will hang on for another two years to reap the benefits of a pre-nuptial agreement that has now been transferred into a post-nuptial agreement. Tiger Woods will go back to golf and adultery (perhaps more selective and secretive in his choice of partners) and the public will suffer from their usual communal amnesia.

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© 2009, Jackie Mason & Raul Felder.