In this issue
April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Dec. 17, 2007 / 8 Teves 5768

Guys, lose the makeup

By Tom Purcell

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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Ah, the holiday season is upon us. So what to get for the modern man who has everything?


According to The Washington Post, eyeliner — the fellows who wear it call it "guyliner," the twits — is the latest trend in "boys behaving girly."

As it goes, Pete Wentz, the pretty-boy bassist for pop-punk band Fall Out Boy, has become the guru of guyliner. The high-fashion fellow recently explained the proper way for a fellow to apply the stuff.

"Smear it because when you're a guy, you don't really want your makeup to look perfect," he says.

Of course. It's not like you'd want to look like a woman or anything.

Men are buying all kinds of cosmetic gunk now: wrinkle-control lotions, shine-reduction powder, clay masks, body-sculpting gel for the abs and all kinds of other goop. According to Euromonitor International, the male makeup market will top $25 billion annually by 2011.

But don't accuse makeup-wearing men of being metrosexuals. They're not metrosexuals anymore. They're Ubersexuals.

According to askmen.com, "Ubersexual" is derived from the German "uber," which means "the greatest." The term was coined by advertising giant JWT. Three JWT executives introduced the term in "The Future of Men," a marketing book that explains how to exploit the changing identities of the sexes to make corporate dough.

"Ubersexuals are the most attractive (not just physically), most dynamic, and most compelling men of their generations," says Marian Salzman, a JWT executive who co-authored the book. "They are confident, masculine, stylish and committed to uncompromising quality in all areas of life."

And they wear makeup.

Take Dustin Schaad, a 22-year-old fellow from Silver Spring, Md. According to the Post, he started wearing makeup in high school because "a little concealer goes a long way when you hit puberty."

My friend, the only thing you've been concealing is your Y chromosome.

Look, men, we've got to get hold of ourselves. It was bad enough when male magazines began running headlines from female magazines: "How to Trim that Belly to Improve Your Self-Esteem and Make Her Happy."

It was bad enough when men began getting face wraps and pedicures and all kinds of treatments that only women used to get.

But makeup? Enough is enough.

Look, men, the marketers are pushing the fiction that the modern male has evolved to a point where he can be manly AND wear makeup. They are doing so because there is big dough in it.

But it's nonsense.

What men and women are is not so complicated. We are more primitive than we think we are — our DNA was designed to help us survive our early days, and there's no escaping that fact.

We no longer need adrenaline in our systems, but our predecessors needed it to survive. You better be able to fight or run fast when a prehistoric creature is about to have you for supper.

Michael Gurian, author of "What Could He Be Thinking? How a Man's Mind Really Works," says survival was the reason the male and female minds evolved as they did. The male mind was geared toward open spaces (the ability to track animals), whereas the female mind was designed to multitask (the ability to manage numerous details that kept the family alive).

And though we no longer need many of the instincts and impulses that are built into our DNA, the unpleasant fact is they are still there. The unpleasant fact is that the game of mating is still rooted in our basic primitive makeup.

Thus, in a general sense, women are still attracted to masculine men who can go out into the fields and kill dinner. And men, generally, are still drawn to young, healthy, feminine women.

Thus, women used to doll themselves up with paints and perfumes to attract men. And we used to chase them — until they caught us. We can pretend otherwise, but human DNA isn't so advanced as we'd like it to be. That's why women wear makeup and men don't.

So please get your modern man something else for Christmas this year.

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© 2007, Tom Purcell