In this issue
April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Nov. 6, 2006 / 15 Mar-Cheshvan, 5767

Get that surgeon's needle away from my eye

By Lenore Skenazy

Printer Friendly Version
Email this article

http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Women have always tried to improve on what G-d gave 'em: Paint on the cheeks, hoops on the skirt, Kleenex in the bra. Fine.

But eyelash transplants? Actual, stick-a-needle-near-my-eye SURGERY when all you really have to do is glue on a pair of false ones and flounce around looking like Liza?

And who wants to look like Liza anyway? (Or flounce?)

Alas, sane readers, these transplants are the newest thing. Hair follicles are harvested from the back of the scalp and sewn to the eyelid, like fringe on a poncho. The new lashes look long, longer ... and longer still. In fact, they keep growing. So maybe don't think fringe on a poncho. Think REAL HAIR GROWING FROM YOUR EYELIDS LIKE A PONYTAIL! Aieee! And you have to trim it!

"We just don't recommend using a pointy scissors," chuckled Dr. Alan Bauman, the Boca Raton hair restoration specialist at the vanguard of this trend. After Bauman appeared on ABC last week, he says, he was overwhelmed with inquiries "from all over the world." Almost half were from fellow surgeons begging to learn how to do the procedure.

You know what that means. In a couple years, eyelash transplants — as "Saw III" as they sound now — will probably be as commonplace as tummy tucks and boob jobs. Which, when you think about it, sound at least "Saw" or "Saw II." But we've gotten so used to slicing and dicing that those operations just seem like nice, normal options for self-improvement. And that's when you know we've gone nuts.

As Americans suck out their fat and fill in their lips and blow up their breasts like microwave popcorn bags, beauty grows impossible to attain — except by more plastic surgery.

A doctor on Long Island told me she has young women coming to her for breast implants because they want to look more "natural." They don't get how insane that sounds.

Maybe they're just surrounded by so many fake body parts they don't know what's real anymore. Last year, almost half a million women had breast augmentations — up 9% from the year before. And it's not just the beautiful people becoming beautiful people. Two-thirds of plastic surgery patients make less than $50,000 a year.

In another 10 years, they'll probably be saving up for eyelash transplants — or for some work on their cankles.

"That's the area between your calf and ankle," explains Adeena Colbert at the American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery, and it's about to become the next, big body part. Doctors whittle stolid-looking cankles into something curvier. The goal is to make them look better, but natural.

As if that's not the nut of the problem. Better is NOT natural when it requires surgery. It's creepy. And that's as plain as the eyelash hanging down the new nose on your Botoxed face.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

JWR contributor Lenore Skenazy is a columnist for The New York Daily News. Comment by clicking here.

Lenore Skenazy Archives

© 2006, NY Daily News