May 14, 2008 The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Snitching to the IRS The Kosher Gourmet by Jill Wendholt Silva: Spring greens with fennel and herbs JWisdom: A Righteous Gentile by Rabbi Mordechai Becher May 13, 2008 Jonathan Mark: For pro-Israel voters, Obama's middle name should be the least of their concerns Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: The Leaker Shield Act JWisdom: Why You & I Never Die: A Jewish View of Immortality, Part II by Rabbi David Aaron May 12, 2008 Chosen Words: A newsletter for personal and spiritual growth gleaned from classic biblical and other sources that will help you enhance your day to day life. Likely the most constructive three minutes you will spend today Mark Steyn: Israel's 'doom' could also be Europe's JWisdom: Holocaust in the Perspective of Faith by Rabbi Nosson Scherman: When Faith Meets Fate, Part One May 9, 2008 Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski: Reverence, Yes; Worship, No Mona Charen: Did Israel Drive Out the Arabs 60 Years Ago? 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Steven Emerson: New U.S. government policy advises agencies to avoid using some of the very same words that make up terror groups' names JWisdom: Why You & I Never Die: A Jewish View of Immortality, Part I by Rabbi David Aaron April 25, 2008 Rabbi Mitchell Wohlberg: Schadenfreude isn't kosher for Passover --- or at any other time Rabbi Berel Wein: The secret of how the data bank of memory is transferred from one generation to the next JWisdom: Stepping Up to A Higher Spiritual Life by Rabbi Lawrence Kelemen, Part III April 24, 2008 Rabbi Nathan Lopes Cardozo: The successful failure Fred Burton and Scott Stewart of Stratfor: Placing the terrorist threat to the food supply in perspective JWisdom: Stepping Up to A Higher Spiritual Life by Rabbi Lawrence Kelemen, Part II April 23, 2008 Connie Ogle: An intricate game of a novel Jonathan Tobin: Making Sense of the 'J Street' Jive JWisdom: Stepping Up to A Higher Spiritual Life by Rabbi Lawrence Kelemen April 22, 2008 Jonathan Rosenblum: Why Israel's 'Leaven law' matters Caroline B. 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Recently someone asked me to translate some financial documents that are clearly forged. Should I agree? Jonathan Rosenblum : Israel is unwittingly helping to fuel the international campaign of delegitimization against it JWisdom: Matzah and leaven as a life philosophy by Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski, M.D. April 4, 2008 Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski: The Mystery of Suffering Caroline B. Glick: Fear of democracy JWisdom: Dirty Jews by Rabbi Sroy Levitansky April 3, 2008 Rabbi Y. Y. Rubinstein: Parents --- and the children who would be them The Kosher Gourmet by Kathy Manweiler: Tempted by restaurant dressings? Don't be. Here are recipes that can be made at home, healthier! 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Jewish World Review Nov. 8, 2004 / 25 Mar-Cheshvan, 5765 The Monty Python Dead Parrot Sketch with Minor Corrections By Steven Plaut OK, OK, it's bad form to celebrate an enemy's downfall. But cut us some slack. The man was a mass murderer http://www.jewishworldreview.com | Abu Mazen: Hello, I wish to register a complaint . . . Hello? Miss? Suha: What do you mean, miss? Abu Mazen: Oh, I'm sorry, I have a cold. I wish to make a complaint. Suha: Sorry, we're closing for lunch. I need to shop in Paris for 400 new shoes. Abu Mazen: Never mind that my lad, I wish to complain about this Rais what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique. You promised me a live terrorist! Suha: Oh yes, the Jihad Green one. What's wrong with it? Abu Mazen: I'll tell you what's wrong with it. It's dead, that's what's wrong with it. Suha: No, no it's resting, look! Abu Mazen: Look my lad, I know a dead terrorist when I see one and I'm looking at one right now. Suha: No, no sir, it's not dead. It's resting. Abu Mazen: Resting? Suha: Yeah, remarkable bird the Jihad Green, beautiful plumage, innit? Abu Mazen: The plumage don't enter into it -- it's stone dead. Suha: No, no -- it's just resting. Abu Mazen: All right then, if it's resting I'll wake it up. (shouts into cage) Hello Abu Amar! I've got a nice cuttlefish for you when you wake up, Abu Amar! Suha: (Jogging cage) There it moved. Abu Mazen: No he didn't. That was you pushing the cage. Suha: I did not. Abu Mazen: Yes, you did. (takes terrorist out of cage, shouts) Hello Abu Abu (bangs it against counter) Polly Abu, wake up. Abu (throws it in the air and lets it fall to the floor) Now that's what I call a dead terrorist. Suha: No, no it's stunned. Abu Mazen: Look my lad, I've had just about enough of this. That terrorist is definitely deceased. And when I bought it not half an hour ago, you assured me that its lack of movement was due to it being tired and shagged out after a long squawk. Suha: It's probably pining for the fjords. Abu Mazen: Pining for the fjords, what kind of talk is that? Look, why did it fall flat on its back the moment I got it home? Suha: The Jihad Green prefers kipping on its back. Beautiful bird, lovely plumage. Abu Mazen: Look, I took the liberty of examining that terrorist, and I discovered that the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been nailed there. Suha: Well of course it was nailed there. Otherwise it would muscle up to those bars and voom. Abu Mazen: Look matey (picks up parrot) this terrorist wouldn't voom if I put four thousand volts through it. It's bleeding demised. Suha: It's not, it's pining. Abu Mazen: It's not pining, it's passed on. This terrorist is no more. It has ceased to be. It's expired and gone to meet its maker. This is a late parrot. It's a stiff. Bereft of life, it rests in peace. If you hadn't nailed it to the perch, it would be pushing up the daisies. It's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot. Suha: Well, I'd better replace it then. Abu Mazen: (to camera) If you want to get anything done in this country you've got to complain till you're blue in the mouth. Suha: Sorry guv, we're right out of chief terrorists. Abu Mazen: I see. I see. I get the picture. Suha: I've got a slug. Abu Mazen: Does it talk? Suha: Not really, no. Abu Mazen: Well, it's scarcely a replacement, then is it? Suha: Listen, I'll tell you what, (handing over a card) tell you what, if you go to my brother's pet shop in Bolton he'll replace your terrorist for you. Abu Mazen: Bolton eh? Suha: Yeah. Abu Mazen: All right. Suha: Look, what do you want? Abu Mazen: No I'm sorry, I'm not prepared to pursue my line of enquiry any further as I think this is getting too silly. Colonel: (Coming in) Quite agree. Quite agree. Silly. Silly . . . silly. Right get on with it. Get on with it. Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in Washington and in the media consider "must reading." Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here. JewishWorldReview.com contributor Steven Plaut is professor of business administration at the Graduate School of Business, University of Haifa. He also teaches in Greece, California, and Hungary, and has a Ph.D. from Princeton University in Economics. A Native-born Philadelphian, he has lived in Israel since 1981. Comment by clicking here. © 2004, Steven Plaut