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Jewish World Review Sept. 8, 2011 / 9 Elul, 5771 Things are looking good for ugly By Lori Borgman
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | A Texas economics professor argues that because unattractive people earn less money over the course of a lifetime than attractive people, unattractive people should be identified as having a disability and be compensated by the government. Kind of leaves you speechless, doesn't it? And on so many fronts. Who determines unattractive? Is there a margin of error? Is there an allowance for a bad hair day? Once you are classified as ugly, as the professor calls it, can you ever be reclassified as not-so-ugly, or even just mildly attractive? If you are upgraded and you previously received money for being ugly, do you have to return your ugly money? Does this nullify what your mother used to say about everybody being attractive to somebody? If University of Texas professor Daniel S. Hamermesh's ideas should become reality and the economy remains weak, what is to keep people from throwing themselves on the steps of Congress and pleading ugly? The professor's idea is bizarre, not to mention borderline cruel and condescending. What's more, he completely overlooks the power of a makeover. Never underestimate the power of a good haircut and losing 10 pounds. That said, the professor does have the sense to recognize that government funds, already stretched thin (an inherently attractive quality), are unlikely to cover subsidies for the unattractive. The solution to this dilemma is simple. Tax the Kardashians. The Kardashians are a group of women who constantly throw themselves before cameras in various stages of undress in order to be on magazine covers and reality television. I could be wrong, but I do not believe they have any marketable skills beyond applying eye liner and constantly changing clothes. They have become rich and famous because they were born with good bone structure. Naturally, in these days of reallocating resources and leveling the playing field, it only makes sense that the government take money from the inherently attractive and give it to the inherently unattractive. The real question is, who will determine who is attractive and who is ugly. The professor claims it is possible to assemble panels that can agree on levels of attractiveness based on a five-point scale with near unanimity. Of course it is possible. It happens every year and is called the Miss America Pageant. Still, this doesn't mean that most Americans want to have their looks judged by a panel, let alone compete in the swimsuit competition. Wouldn't it be something if the War on Obesity was joined by the War on Ugly and the government offered free chemical peels, liposuction, dental caps and nose jobs along with the now free birth control? "I pledge allegiance to the flag, and to the spa for which it stands." The professor asks how we should remedy this disparity between the good looking and not so good looking and his answer is money. How sad that his answer does not encourage basic respect for one's fellow man. This is one case where most people may not want to hear, "The check is in the mail."
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JWR contributor Lori Borgman is the author of , most recently, "Catching Christmas" (Click HERE to purchase. Sales help fund JWR.) and I Was a Better Mother Before I Had Kids To comment, please click here. To visit her website click here.
© 2009, Lori Borgman
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Arnold Ahlert | |||||||||||||
