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April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review

You don't light up my life

By Jim Mullen




http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | I think I own the only car in the world that does not automatically turn off its lights when I park it and cut the engine. For some unknowable reason, that does not qualify my car as a clunker, and I was not eligible to put $4,500 of your money toward buying a clunker of the future.


Now, there is probably never a good time to have a dead battery, but I think I found the worst place to have zero juice: a modern gas station.


On a recent golf outing, Eldon, the guy with the biggest van, drove us all to the course. We met him at the truck stop out on the interstate, parked our cars and loaded our clubs into his van. After four and a half hours of asking myself why I play this game, after four and a half hours of being told, "You lifted up," "You stepped out of it," "You bailed out on that one," "Your grip is all wrong," Eldon finally got us back to our cars. All I kept thinking was: Waterboard a man and you've tortured him for a day; teach a man to golf and you've tortured him for life. Back in the luxury of being alone in my own vehicle, I would at least not have to listen to any more advice from people who played worse golf than I did.


Did I mention that it had been foggy when I left the house that morning? That I had turned on those headlights that don't turn off automatically so no one would run into me in the fog? Did I mention that on the drive to the gas station, the fog lifted and it turned into a bright, sunny day that was brighter than the glow of my dashboard, so I didn't notice my lights were still on?


You may ask, as my wife does each time this happens, "Doesn't it make a loud sound or an alarm when you open the door?" If we were still speaking, I would say, "Not loud enough."


The good news: I was at a gas station, a place full of people who know about cars. In a few minutes, someone would jump my car and I'd be on my way. An hour later, it occurred to me that I'd have received better help if my car had died outside a bridal shop. The two teens behind the counter at the gas station seemed excited to learn that cars had batteries. It took them completely by surprise.


"Is that one of those new ones that you have to plug in? We don't do that here. I didn't even know they were making them yet." From the way this kid said "you," I knew he spelled it "u."


Except for windshield wiper fluid and motor oil, there was nothing in this gas station remotely related to gas, or motoring, or dead batteries. It was all heat-lamp food and sunscreen -- the necessities. The sunscreen is there to protect your skin from the deadly rays of the heat lamps. It was like asking for automobile help in the lobby of a movie theater. "Sorry your car doesn't work, but for a quarter extra you can get the medium popcorn."


Finally, a Good Samaritan who knew what a car battery was and had jumper cables (what happened to mine, I'll never know) in his trunk parked next to me and got me on the road again. I shook his hand, and said, "I can't thank you enough." Then it hit me that I could thank this guy enough and in a deep and profound way. "Hey, mister! Whatever you do, don't take up golf," I yelled at him as he drove away.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

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Jim Mullen is the author of "It Takes a Village Idiot: Complicating the Simple Life" and "Baby's First Tattoo."


Previously:


Fair or not: Country living is far from ‘Little House’
A parable for the ‘ages’
Top 100 Cable news stories of the century
Green dumb
A developing story
Thinking outside the lunch box
What's good for the goose is good for the scanner
Newspapers will survive, but network TV?
A really big show of generation gaps
When pigs flu
The reports of our decline have been greatly exaggerated
Mergers and admonitions
Invest in gold: little, yellow, different
Stuck in Folsom Penthouse
Collecting karma
Setting loose the creative ‘juice’
It's all in the numbers
You're damaging your brain with practical skills
The real rat pack
The unspeakable luxury of the Park-O-Matic
Gross-ery shopping



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