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March 19, 2010
Rabbi Berel Wein: The Divine is in the details
JWisdom.com Stewards of sacrifice with Rabbi Sroy Levitansky (5 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick: Why Obama is waging war on Israel
March 18, 2010
Cal Thomas: Israel's New Enemy: America?
JWisdom.com Love me not? with Rabbi David Aaron (5 minutes)
Jonathan Rosenblum: Washington Throws a Tantrum
March 17, 2010
Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Orwell, Santayana, and Me
Jonathan Tobin: How Many Lives Is Biden's Pride Worth?
March 16, 2010
Steven Emerson: Combating Lawfare
JWisdom.com How to perform a miracle with Rabbi Yaakov Asher Sinclair (4 minutes)
Anne Bayefsky: Behind Obama's Dangerous Overreaction on Israel
March 15, 2010
The Jewish Ethicist By Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Father's obligations toward minor children
JWisdom.com Moody, Grumpy, Irritable Children with Sarah Chana Radcliffe (5 minutes)
Judith Graham: Get the whole picture before a CT
March 12, 2010
Rabbi David Aaron: You CAN have Heaven on Earth
JWisdom.com Manufacturing mediums with Rabbi Sroy Levitansky (4 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick: The march of the Red-Green brigades
March 11, 2010
Glenn Garvin: Conspiracy theories, why people believe them and how they spread
JWisdom.com For Yourself, Not By Yourself with Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff (8 minutes)
The Kosher Gourmet by Linda Gassenheimer : Turn leftovers into tasty New England hash
Paul Richter: Biden promises 'viable Palestine' is in the offing
March 10, 2010
Paul Greenberg: Death Checks In
JWisdom.com How To Get A (Real) Life with Rabbi Warren Goldstein ( EXTENDED EPISODE)
Paul Richter: Israel exerts soverign right to its capital as Biden looks on astounded
Richard A. Serrano: 'Jihad Jane' indictment alleges threat from within U.S.
March 9, 2010
Wesley Pruden: Joe's Israeli adventure
JWisdom.com Free To Be (Responsibly) You and Me! with Rabbi Naftali Brawer ( 8 MINUTES)
David G. Savage: Supreme Court to rule on free speech in case of soldier's funeral
March 8, 2010
The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Make a fuss about those who cuss?
JWisdom.com Finding or Losing Yourself? Here's How! with Rabbi David Aaron ( 5 MINUTES)
Steven Emerson: America must learn from the UK about the future of Islamist subversion
March 5, 2010
Rabbi Berel Wein: Golden Calf still with us --- except it has multiplied
JWisdom.com The Limits of Eternity with Rabbi Sroy Levitansky ( 4 MINUTES)
Caroline B. Glick: Biden's lost cause
March 4, 2010
Alan M. Dershowitz: How About A Real Campaign Against Abuses?
JWisdom.com Using Things, Loving People with Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff ( 7 MINUTES)
Jordan "Gorf" Gorfinkel's Everything's Relative
March 3, 2010
JWisdom.com Grasping The Name of Your Life Game with Rabbi Warren Goldstein ( 8 MINUTES)
The Kosher Gourmet by Marialisa Calta : A cowboy's recipes for really good grub
March 2, 2010
Rabbi Avi Shafran: Someone's there
Diane Toroian Keaggy : Have we misunderstood Michelangelo?
March 1, 2010
JWisdom.com Whole in One with Rabbi David Aaron ( 5 MINUTES)
Michael Muskal: Hillary meets with Israeli official, discusses gefilte fish dispute
Feb. 26, 2010
Rabbi Francis Nataf: The Megilla of Spring
JWisdom.com A Biblical Secret for a More Powerful You with Rabbi Sroy Levitansky ( 5 MINUTES)
Caroline B. Glick: When rhetoric rules the roost
Feb. 25, 2010
The Jewish Ethicist By Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: When walking away from your mortgage is both economically sound and makes ethical sense
JWisdom.com The Second Most Important Question in Your Life with Rabbi Yehoshua Karsh ( 5 MINUTES)
Seema Mehta : U.S.-Israel relations raised in California's Senate race --- by conservatives
Feb. 24, 2010
Rabbi Avi Shafran: The gift of the ‘prayer bomber’
Steven Emerson: Why Religious Freedom Commission is under attack
Feb. 23, 2010
Dennis Prager: Government, Yes! The Divine and Parents, No!
JWisdom.com The Last Laugh of Enlightenment with Rabbi Yaakov Asher Sinclair ( 5 MINUTES)
Anne Applebaum: Prepare for war with Iran --- in case Israel strikes
Feb. 22, 2010
Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Is it not refreshing Tiger Woods' career has crashed and burned so dramatically?
JWisdom.com Esther and the third Truth with Rabbi David Aaron ( 9 MINUTES)
Kelly Brewington: Going smoke-free may raise diabetes risk
Feb. 19, 2010
Rabbi David Aaron: Is the Divine beyond us or within us?
JWisdom.com Olympic Faith with Rabbi Sroy Levitansky ( 5 MINUTES)
Caroline B. Glick: Israel and the West are perpetrators of a myth that endangers the Jewish State
Feb. 18, 2010
Cal Thomas: Who is Rashad Hussain?
JWisdom.com A Wedding Disaster to Remember with Rabbi Y.Y. Rubinstein ( 3 MINUTES)
Feb. 17, 2010
JWisdom.com Think your life is messed up? with Rabbi David Aaron ( 11 MINUTES)
Greg Logan: 'Greatest Jewish sporting event of all time since David versus Goliath' may be postponed because of bar mitzvah
Feb. 16, 2010
Anya Martin : Boy's 'cerebral palsy' fixed with diet
JWisdom.com Feet On The Street Spirituality with Gavriel Aryeh Sanders ( 8 MINUTES)
Marty Peretz: Let Europe Mind Its Own Business. It Brings Nothing To The Table Save For Mischief
Feb. 15, 2010
Herb Geduld: Lincoln and the Jews
JWisdom.com Are Our Children Really Ours? with Rabbi Mordechai Becher ( 5 MINUTES)
Susan King: 'Wolf Man' reflected writer's wartime Jewish experience

Jewish World Review Sept. 6, 2005 / 2 Elul, 5765

Reality baby

By Brad Dickson


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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Today's shocking news comes from The Netherlands where the latest incarnation of the Dutch version of reality show Big Brother features a contestant who's seven months pregnant.

Now the reality show producers face a moral dilemma. (Which is the first time the words "reality show" and "moral" have been used in the same sentence.) Whether to do the right thing, and have the contestant discreetly give birth where no one will see her (on NBC?), or, to show the birth live for the biggest reality ratings since that chatty bimbo married the goofy dorkus. (Note: I'm not talking about Camilla Parker Bowles and Prince Charles.) The smart money here says not only will they show the birth, but will utilize super slow mo and the first use ever of something called a "Womb Cam."

Asking reality producers in any country to choose between doing what's tasteful and what garners ratings is like asking a starving pit bull if he wants to gnaw on the succulent T-bone you've placed in front of him, or discuss the geopolitical divide between...oh, look, he's already gnawing.

The Netherlands version of Big Brother is considered the granddaddy of such shows, this is the origin of that malignancy called Reality Television. The program features about ten folks living in a house with cameras trained on them 24/7. The home viewer observes the contestants do all sorts of exciting things, like brush their hair, eat, argue over who didn't do the dishes, stare at the wall, argue over who stares at the wall best, and, zzzzz...sorry, I nodded off.

So maybe they want to bring a baby into the mix to liven things up. A baby may actually make a decent reality personality. A two-day-old has the same maturity level as your Fear Factor contestant, and is less likely to stick something gross in his mouth. Also, the baby would certainly cry less than women voted off The Bachelor. But reality show producers are so cruel they wouldn't just have one baby. They'd bring in a more attractive baby, and make the mom choose if she wanted the cute baby or her "Average Joe infant."

You may say, Well, Columnist, this program is in The Netherlands, why should we care? Glad you asked. Like Bubonic Plague, typhoid, Mad Cow Disease and karaoke, many reality show concepts originate abroad and then spread to the U.S. in the form of parasites attached to the undersides of rabid monkeys.

If this gimmick draws big ratings in The Netherlands in no time not only will reality contestants over here be giving birth, but Katie Couric will find herself on her back with Matt Lauer shouting "PUSH!" as cameras roll.

It's not that far-fetched. I worked in television for fourteen years, so I know how TV executives think. Also, when they think. (For half an hour after lunch, every other Thursday.) To them a five-minute-old baby is not a baby, but rather that "coveted, youth demographic."

So I predict soon there will be frequent live births on American TV.

The goal is to get the largest number of people possible watching. Which raises the question, "What if the reality baby is not scheduled to arrive during Sweeps Week?" Simple, that's why we have C-sections. Another consideration: under the law any baby born on camera is considered a "child actor" which means if our first Reality Baby is born at one pm, by 6 pm he will have been arrested on suspicion of committing at least two serious crimes.

And the next time our major networks refuse to air a presidential press conference concerning the future of this great nation because it'd interrupt regular network programming, that regular network programming may not just feature crazy reality goobers swallowing live beetle larva and trying to marry multi-millionaires, but may include something really substantial, like a newborn spitting up.

Somewhere, the guy who invented TV is spinning in his grave.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.



JWR contributor Brad Dickson was a monologue staff writer for The Tonight Show With Jay Leno for 13 years. He's presently developing a network television pilot. Comment by clicking here.


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