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April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Aug 16, 2012/ 28 Menachem-Av, 5772

The being and the finding

By Sharon Randall




http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | One of the things I love about my home state, North Carolina, is its motto: "Esse quam videri." It means, I am told, "To be, rather than to seem."

I learned that bit of trivia long after I had left the South to live my life and rear my children in California, where the state motto is -- guess what?

No. It is not "Whoopee!"

It is "Eureka!" -- which means, I am told, "I have found it!"

I could speak at length on the contrasts, not to mention the ironies, of living one's life in two distant places with cultures that some might say are about as different as different gets.

My mother, were she living, would gladly expound on that.

But what struck me this morning -- for reasons I hope to make apparent, if you will kindly bear with me -- was this: As different as those places may seem, their mottos are remarkably similar.

Or so I like to think.

Both speak of contentment -- a peace that comes with being who we are, with no need for pretense, and finding whatever we are looking for.

What do you think? Does one follow the other -- the being and the finding? I don't know why I think of such things. Sometimes they just stick in my mind like sand in the crotch of a Speedo.

It started this morning when I woke up thinking about some folks I met recently on a cross-country flight. Actually, I didn't meet them. I sat behind them for five hours and listened to them talk. You can learn a lot about people that way.

A middle-aged couple (maybe married, maybe siblings) sat on either side of a very frail elderly woman they called "Mama."

Mama, I surmised, was not keen on flying, and the couple were doing their best -- a truly impressive effort -- to make her believe that a jumbo jet flying at 40,000 feet was actually an SUV barreling down the freeway.

Mama wasn't buying it.

"I need to get out," she said.

"We'll stop soon, Mama," said the woman, patting her arm.

We hit an air pocket and several passengers, including Mama, shrieked.

"Whoa!" said the man. "That was a big bump in the road!"

This went on until, luckily, Mama fell asleep. I considered ordering drinks for the couple but decided it was probably best that they stayed sober.

Shortly before landing, Mama woke up and announced very clearly that she wanted out.

"We're almost there," said the man. "The guy who's driving is looking for a parking place."

Seconds later, we landed with a thud and screeching brakes.

"Oh, Lord!" Mama screamed. "That guy can't drive!"

It got a big laugh, especially from the flight attendants.

Somehow it reminded me of a card I sent my sister years ago showing a big-boned woman in a sensible swimsuit with a flirty little ruffle around the bottom. The caption read: "I think the ruffle helps, don't you?"

Once, when I was driving my 4-year-old and his buddy Eric to preschool, we passed a car that sat covered with a canvas tarp. Eric laughed and pointed.

"Look at that," he said. "Grown-ups are so dumb. Everybody knows there's a car under there."

Out of the mouths of babes.

Most of us, I think, want to be, rather than to seem. Nobody likes a phony. We all want to find what we're looking for.

But what if what we're looking for is the person we're meant to be? What would happen if we helped each other find it?

We can pretend we're on the ground if we're flying through the air, but it won't make the ride less bumpy. And ruffles only help if they make us feel better. Everybody still knows there's a car under there.

Maybe we should just be ourselves.

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Previously:


When fishing, she lands companionship

Trophy sunsets

Helping a friend find the way

A home abloom with family and sunflowers

Healing is our highest calling

Needing help can really make you feel so, well . . . helpless

The bedspread from hell

A phone call to treasure

It was close to the best gift my father had ever received

It was the right time --- not a moment too late or too soon

25 tips for staying married

Some people water your soul --- a storm worth waiting for

Driving country roads helps restore hope

Confessions of a bad-weather magnet

The new star of my husband's harem

Shared family moments are precious, irreplaceable

What I'll remember from serving on the jury in a murder case

When someone walks into your life and never lets you go

Look for beauty

We can't always 'be there' when we're needed

Picture-perfect memories

To love someone is to want to hear all their stories

With age should come at least some wisdom

A story for my grandson

Regretting she didn't help out a woman in need

Post-holiday-visit blues

For 2012, tuck some hope into your wallet

The measure of a time well spent is not where you went or what you did. It's the way you smile remembering it

Treating people we love like the Jello salad at Thanksgiving dinner

We all need something or someone to pull for

Hold on to treasured words, don't trust memory

A storybook princess

Love reaches forward, never back

How to Watch a Sunset

Waiting often comes with gifts

An exceptional book club

There is no guilt in moving forward

Celebrations full of love and buttercream

It takes a whole village of shoes to raise a child

The best stories always tell us who we are

Stop, look back . . . and listen

The great outdoors, if one's lucky, a rock-solid companion

An iChat with my grandson

Lightening bugs and other things make us glow

Each and every Fourth of July a cause for celebration



© 2012, SCRIPPS HOWARD NEWS SERVICE

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