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If we could only get them to use their ego for good By Chris Erskine
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Ego makes the sports world go round. We could either become bitter about that, or mock it. So with mocking in mind, we give you the somewhat annual All-Ego Sports Team, based on a careful study of the boneheads and blunderkinds who have graced us with their over-the-top behavior. As you can see, it's been a very good (or bad) year. First team
The captain of this year's All-Ego Team. In an era of tatted-up, trash-talking ballplayers, he sets new standards in icky self-importance. Even so, doesn't the NBA get better by the minute? Where would All-Ego teams be without it?
If ego were rum, he'd be The NFL— sports league: If this control-freaky league were an emperor, it'd be Kaiser Wilhelm. Oversees a magnificent product with a heavy hand and too much
If he sticks around much longer, we'll have to get him rust-proofed. Get off the bike already and serve as a spokesman for some worthy cause. Otherwise, you're going to wind up as the Brett Favre of cycling.
Will he eventually purchase the Los Angeles Dodgers? Will he add mascots and midgets? Somehow, the dude seems destined to wind up in
Free agency: OK, not a person. But what a beast. What has been good for pro athletes has been a disaster for fans, particularly in baseball, where the long season should make for a more familial atmosphere. Who are these guys?
Any fan who got a foul ball and didn't flip it to the closest kid: You expect athletes to do the right thing? Why not you? New rule: If you get a foul ball, go ahead and wave it proudly in the air. Then hand it to the nearest youngster. Second team
Headed to the All-Ego Hall of Fame — on the very first ballot. The McCourts— Dodger dawgs You might've heard about the breakup? Pretty good owners till then.
Soon, his only endorsement will be for eHarmony.com. Scott Boras—greed counselor: See free agency (above).
Serena Williams—Anger management specialist: Yes, female athletes can be as boorish as men. Congrats. The Philly Phanatic— Baseball fuzz-kill: A Muppet on meth.
Kobe Bryant—Recovering egomaniac: Because he'd probably be insulted if we didn't include him. Pete Carroll—Fugitive: Real men clean up the messes they leave. Barry Bonds—Chemist: And you thought we forgot? Dishonorable mention: Chad Ochocinco, Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here. Comment by clicking here.
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Arnold Ahlert | |||||||||||||
