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Jewish World Review August 31, 2006 / 7 Elul 5766 Unreal Real Estate By Lloyd Garver http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Want to sell your house? Before putting it on the market, you'll probably want it to look as good as possible. So, you'll do a few things like paint the gutters, fix that leaky faucet, and finally throw away all those piles of papers you're never going to look at. But that's the old-fashioned way. Today, the business of getting a house to look as good as possible before you sell it is much more sophisticated. In fact, there are professionals you can hire to do this for you called "home stagers." They'll toss your old furniture in storage and rent you better looking stuff. They'll place beautiful plants all over the house and they'll hang impressive paintings on the walls. When I first learned about this, it seemed a bit excessive, but I figured "business is business." That was until I heard about the latest thing that home stagers will do to make your house seem more appealing — they'll hire actors to be a fake happy family in your home. Since I live in the city built on fantasy, I assumed that this "home staging" was just an L.A. thing. But it's happening all over the country. I can't speak for the rest of the world, but if it's going on in Tupelo, Miss., can Paris be far behind? There is even an organization that trains and "accredits" home stagers. Their Web site explains that an "ASP (an Accredited Staging Professional) is a professional who has completed a rigorous three-day training program that teaches specific techniques and concepts in home presentation and Staging. This includes one day of class room instruction and another day of actual hands on "staging in a real home on the market for sale." Wow, after that impressive training, I'm surprised these people aren't performing brain surgery on the kitchen table when prospective buyers come by. Oops, maybe I shouldn't have put that idea out there. Now that we know that the house might be filled with actors, how do we know that the "owners" we're introduced to aren't just hired by the owners? How do we know that the "grandma," who's sobbing about moving out of a place that has been "more of a member of the family than just a house," isn't an actress? And how do we know that couple that's ooh-ing and ah-ing about the house and loudly shouting that they're going to put in a bid today aren't really actors? At least one Southern California company likes to stage a phony birthday party while prospective buyers look at the house. That way, the would-be buyer can see a crowd of happy people having a good time in the home. Some stagers make sure there's a fire in the fireplace, install a good swing set in the backyard, and put romantic, scented candles in the master bedroom. As UCLA's assistant marketing professor, Ely Dahan, says, "It's all about appealing to the emotions of the buyers, subtly suggesting things to help them envision themselves living in this house." Well, if that's the goal, I think the actors they hire should be conveying more inviting images than just a birthday party. When a couple walks into a house they're thinking about buying, they should hear things like: "You know, you look so much thinner in this house." Or, "You really look like you have more hair in this house." Or, "I've heard all the kids in this neighborhood are very respectful of their parents." If they really want to attract buyers, maybe the phony "owners" should stage a conversation like this: "Honey, I can't believe it! We won the lottery!" "And we're the third family on this block to win!" But these companies have to make sure they stay away from hiring actors who like to perform in a more realistic style. Otherwise, when the prospective buyers walk into the master bedroom with the scented candles and see the actor couple in that antique king-sized bed, they're likely to hear something more realistic like this: "This never happened in our old house," followed by: "I'm sorry, but I just can't get in the mood while I'm worrying about making the mortgage payments on this place." Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here. JWR contributor Lloyd Garver has written for many television shows, ranging from "Sesame Street" to "Family Ties" to "Frasier." He has also read many books, some of them in hardcover. Comment by clicking here. Visit his website by clicking here. Archives © 2005, Lloyd Garver

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