|
|
|
Jewish World Review July 11, 2012/ 21 Tamuz, 5772 Family Dinner By Alan Douglas
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Some years ago my wife and I were pleasantly surprised by a telephone call from my cousin's daughter. She had relocated to our city a few months ago, and she had discovered, by accident, that she actually moved into our neighborhood. It was a surprise because our family didn't communicate much, with no cousins' club or family dinners, and infrequent visits, my cousins were virtually strangers to me. I wouldn't have recognized my cousins if they walked by me on the sidewalk. We had the usual gripes, feuds and complaints that all families had, but the source of our family separation was geographic distance. During the 1940s my father landed 1,400 miles away from the rest of the family, and that is the primary reason my branch of the family was not as "connected" to the others.
This telephone call was an opportunity for me to have a "real" family and get to know my cousin's daughter and my cousin. My wife talks to her family frequently so I wanted parity. My gosh, I knew that I could be lovable, and warm, and open to bonding with my genetic pool. Sure, I was a few generations older than my cousin's daughter, but wasn't I "cool, hip, with it" and interesting to young people? You betcha !!! My good natured wife, endured my plans for a campaign to win over my family, or, at least my cousin's daughter.
We had our cousin's daughter over for home cooked meals, Thanksgiving, Passover Seders and other festivities. She was looking for work and I have to admit we weren't much help. She was disappointed we didn't have pull in the community and did not hire her. We loaned our computer, proofread her resume and did what we could but ultimately she found a series of jobs she liked, but none of these paid very much. Our cousin's daughter lived with roommates in an apartment and given her employment and wage status we understood her situation. She did invite us to a party at her apartment and we brought a nice gift. She was clearly surprised we came and introduced us to her friends, who were all about thirty years younger than us. We chit chatted the best we could, and remained a respectable amount of time at the party, before beating a hasty retreat.
Then the big opportunity arrived. Our cousin's daughter called to tell us that her parents were coming for a visit and they wanted to have a family dinner. We swore we wouldn't violate any rules of confidentiality and rat her out to her parents regarding her dating, social life, and anything else. She was relieved, and said she would call back with details for arranging the family dinner.
This was it! I was living the American dream, soon to be surrounded by my extended family at a dinner reminiscent of the Norman Rockwell Thanksgiving illustration for The Saturday Evening Post. My wife accused me of getting carried away, but that was just jealousy. Or perhaps my wife feared that my family would ignore her and tell boring stories for hours the way her family did. My wife believes, that even by the standards of family weirdness, that my family is, "super sized" weird. I bragged to my wife that my family would have interesting, and possibly exciting tales to tell over dinner. She would eat her words. This was going to be a fun, family dinner.
The big night arrived and we met my cousin and his wife at a nice, upscale, restaurant my cousin had selected. I told my wife as we were driving to the restaurant that we should probably pay since it was our city, and we were the hosts. She said that after all the dinners and kindness we had extended to their daughter and that my cousins had picked an expensive restaurant so they could pay, and I should let them. We discussed this topic until, as is the rule with all such discussions, I totally agreed that my wife was right and I would do exactly as she said.
My cousins were very nice and we had a pleasant time catching up. They explained that their daughter would appear shortly. I have to admit that instead of tales of intrigue or exciting conversation, my relatives discussed how awful commuting was, television shows, and the problems at work. The same stuff my wife's family complains about during their gatherings. I accepted that it wasn't perfect, but it was a family dinner so I was content.
About ten minutes later, my cousin's daughter arrived at our table, and her parents beamed with pride, when she announced that she would be our server at the restaurant that evening. And that is how, I ended up paying for an expensive meal that night, bought my cousin and his wife dinner, and at the end of the evening after saying how great it was to "see family," gave a generous tip to their daughter. It was George Burns who said, "Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family, in another city." As we were drove home in silence, my wife placed her had on mine, and said tenderly, "Super sized."
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
Comment by clicking here.
JWR contributor, Alan Douglas, an author, media executive, award winning screenwriter (not produced), and attorney, lives con brio- except when he is grumpy.
Library Idol Worship
© 2010 Alan Douglas
|
Arnold Ahlert | |||||||||||||
