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April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review July 28, 2011 / 25 Tammuz, 5771

Stop, look back . . . and listen

By Sharon Randall




http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Someone once told me that the real issues in any relationship rarely surface until after about the first three years.

And then they never go away.

But sometimes the issues rise quickly to the top -- like chunks of soured cream in a big glass of buttermilk -- especially when the relationship is marriage.

My husband and I were married six years ago. We dated for five years before that and worked together (he was my editor) for a decade before it occurred to him to ask me out. I don't recall the initial issues in our relationship. That's not to say there weren't any. Far be it from me to say that. But for some reason, I can't remember what they were. Or maybe I don't care to put them in a column. Either way, I will say this: The man has a tendency to leave me in the dust.

I first noticed it when we were dating -- not so much when it was just the two of us, mostly when we were in a crowd. He would take off like the lead husky on a dog-sled team and leave me in back to bring up the rear.

Have you ever brought up the rear on a dog sled? It is not the most pleasant of tracks to trot.

The world is comprised, it seems, of two kinds of people: Those who are born to lead, and those who are born dumb enough to follow. My husband is of the former. I am of the latter.

That, in itself, is not a bad thing. Leaders need followers and followers need leaders. It takes both to get where you want to go -- a reciprocal arrangement like so many others in marriage.

All I am saying is this: If leaders want followers to keep trotting after them, is it too much to ask that they at least glance back over their shoulders on occasion to make sure the followers are still alive?

I don't mind following. I am good at it. I just don't like the feeling that I'm being ditched. We have discussed at length my feelings on the matter, and he tries, I think, to be sensitive.

Once, soon after we moved to Las Vegas, we went shopping on a day that was dangerously close to what my grandmother would call slightly hotter than the hinges on the gates of hell.

As we started across a parking lot, trying not to mire up in a sea of melting asphalt, my husband bolted ahead of me. Twenty yards later, he looked back.

"Run!" I shouted, pretending to swoon. "Forget you ever knew me! Run on! Save yourself!"

After that, he hardly ever ditched me anymore. Dr. Phil, I was sure, would be proud.

But recently, it happened again. We went to Lowe's to look at appliances. Maybe most Lowe's are big, but this one was like "Big Momma" Lowe's. I have lived in smaller states. We had to walk 20 miles to get to the appliances. Pretty soon he was walking ahead of me.

So I hid behind a shelf of light bulbs and waited to see how far he'd go before he missed me.

He went a long way. I ran after him and hid again. He kept walking. I kept running and hiding. Finally, he looked back.

"You didn't even miss me!" I said. "I could've been dead under a pile of light bulbs!"

He rolled his eyes. "I knew you weren't dead."

"How could you know that?" I said. "You never looked back!"

"I didn't have to look. I could hear you."

"You could HEAR me?"

He pointed to my flip-flops. "Yeah," he said, grinning. "I could hear your feet."

Then he took my hand and led me off to the appliances.

It's easy to feel unappreciated, invisible and forgotten, when no one seems to notice all the little things you do.

But the next time you think no one is watching, stop and think again.

Maybe they're just listening for the sound of your feet.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

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Previously:


The great outdoors, if one's lucky, a rock-solid companion

An iChat with my grandson

Lightening bugs and other things make us glow

Each and every Fourth of July a cause for celebration



© 2011, SCRIPPS HOWARD NEWS SERVICE

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