Most of us deal daily with agonizing and annoying customer service at home, leading to anxiety and rage. It's a new medical entity that starts like this.
"Hello, this is BCD from WXY plumbing. We will be at your home tomorrow sometime between 7 a.m. and 7 p.m.," commands the dispatcher-in-chief.
So the homeowner waits and waits and waits. There are reports at the corner as well as coffee house buzz of men and women having heart attacks, TIAs, strokes and dying of old age from the stress of waiting. Nervously, we wonder if our kitchens will flood, our homes will blow up, or all of our food will spoil. This leads to more anxiety.
We can rocket an astronomical number of miles to far-away planets, moons and space stations, with a time of arrival estimated within seconds. We have little trouble maintaining voice contact the entire time. We can even see them on monitors.
So why can't a customer service dispatcher get the serviceman and homeowner to the same site at the same time in less than a 12-hour window? After all, down here on Earth, we do have cell and land phones, satellite radios, and global positioning devices that can locate you, the serviceman and the truck, to within three feet.
We all are well aware that if you give any junior or high school student in the nation a cell phone they can locate, talk with, and make precise plans with any friend or classmate in the country. To the minute.
Now much of this overwhelming customer service is necessitated by thousands of new technologies, electrical appliances, computers and sophisticated toys of status. This latter problem is made worse in my community by the affluence of "The Orange County." Gone are the days when the milkman would be the only intruder into our homes. And we knew precisely when he would arrive — like before we awoke.
Now back to the chase. On the morning after the call from your "friendly" service dispatchers, those pesky, pitiful, impertinent trucks line the once peaceful pristine curbs like platoons ready for battle. Frequently you are taken prisoner by the other guy's trucks blocking your driveway.
A few suggestions.
1. When the dispatcher calls, give your cell and land phone numbers. Now you're not a hostage in your own home. Tell them to call you 20 minutes prior to arrival or if they are severely delayed. You should do the same if you are delayed. This saves time and ultimately helps everyone.
2. Customer service dispatchers, service and repairmen need to realize it is the customers who pay their salaries. Having already paid once to purchase their products, we are now paying a second time to fix them because the goods didn't perform as well as advertised.
3. Some companies get it right. Adelphia gives a two-hour window and, if late, gives you a $20 credit. FedEx gives a four-hour window and calls you 30 minutes prior to delivery. Ask the dispatcher about their policy.
4. Now, there is some humor in all this. Last week my wife smelled gas leaking from the outside meter. It seems the utility company "upgraded" our meter while we were gone. A day later they arrived for a second try. The next day it leaked again. On the third try they missed the 12-hour window by one hour. It turned out the meter wasn't screwed in tightly. Had we known, we could have asked two neighbors to twist the service man while he held on to his wrench!
5. Remember, stuff does happen. But it shouldn't happen all the time.
So, why a 12-hour window for local customer service? This isn't rocket science — but then again, maybe that's the problem. We've made all this much too complicated.
But if you need to reach us, we will probably be at home waiting for the customer service guy.
Editor's note: Michael Arnold Glueck, M.D., wrote this week's comment while waiting for the gas guy
