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Jewish World Review July 24, 2003 / 24 Tamuz, 5763

Argus Hamilton

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Consumer Reports


And now for the
important news ....


http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com | Saddam Hussein released another audiotape to Baghdad on Friday. Tracking him down is a simple matter of subtraction now. This week his pursuers were able to scratch any upcoming father and son banquets off the list of places to stake out.

Udey and Qusay were betrayed by a neighbor in Mosul for the reward money. The informant will get thirty million dollars. To give you an idea of just how much money that is, the informant has just been charged with sexual assault in Colorado.

Howard Dean led in a poll of California voters released Monday. His campaign raised six million dollars on the Internet alone. It's more anecdotal evidence that nothing really makes money on the Internet but gambling, pornography and hoaxes.

California began verifying signatures Tuesday on the petition to recall Gray Davis. It wasn't easy to collect one and a half million signatures. After ten years of using debit cards and e-mail, a lot of Californians don't remember how to sign their names.

Arnold Schwarzenegger rushed back to California from Europe Tuesday. He made it in time to file papers to run for governor. It could get the campaign off to a dramatic start when the Secretary of State asks a German if his papers are in order.

Presiding Bishop Frank Griswold asked Episcopalians Tuesday for unity on gay rights. Episcopalians and Methodists are from the Church of England. We are the one faith about which people can safely say that the head of the church is a real Queen.

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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements, please click here.

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01/02/03:Annual Review of the Past Year's Mischief
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© 2002, Argus Hamilton