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April 21, 2014

Andrew Silow-Carroll: Passoverkill? Suggestions to make next year's seders even more culturally sensitive

Sara Israelsen Hartley: Seeking the Divine: An ancient connection in a new context

Christine M. Flowers: Priest's execution in Syria should be call to action

Courtnie Erickson: How to help kids accept the poor decisions of others

Lizette Borreli: A Glass Of Milk A Day Keeps Knee Arthritis At Bay

Lizette Borreli: 5 Health Conditions Your Breath Knows Before You Do

The Kosher Gourmet by Betty Rosbottom Coconut Walnut Bars' golden brown morsels are a beautifully balanced delectable delight

April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review June 11, 2010 29 Sivan 5770

The Return of Ask Dr. Politics!

By Roger Simon




http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Q: Where have you been? It's been months.

A: I decided that while anyone can write about health care from the outside, it takes a real journalist to explore it from the inside.

Q: So?

A: So I had my legs cut off.

Q: That's not funny!

A: You're telling me. You want to know what's funny about losing your legs?

Q: What?

A: They're always in the last place you look.

Q: I can't tell if you are making this up. How did you lose your legs?

A: Would you believe a skydiving accident?

Q: No.

A: How about a snowboarding pileup?

Q: No.

A: How about I got an infection, and it led to blood poisoning?

Q: That I believe.

A: The doctors had to cut off my right leg below the knee and almost all of my left foot. After a long stint in intensive care, then seven weeks at the National Rehabilitation Hospital of Washington, I am now in a wheelchair. But I can't wait to get back on my own two — artificial — feet again.

Q: What will those be like?

A: I am hoping they will be like Iron Man, and I will be able to fly and kick over buildings.

Q: You are being very brave about this.

A: It is amazing how brave you can be when you have no choice. Also, I am on a lot of drugs.

Q: I have a gruesome and disgusting question.

A: Of course, you do. You are one of my readers.

Q: What do they actually do with amputated limbs? Bury them? Burn them? What?

A: They put them on eBay.

Q: No!

A: Actually, I don't know what they do with them — but, personally, I would not eat at a fast-food restaurant within 10 blocks of a hospital.

Q: Have there been any aftereffects of your surgeries?

A: I keep having the same dream: I am floating in a dark, frigid void. After what seems like an eternity, I see a faint light that grows steadily brighter. I make my way to it. Seated on a golden throne and surrounded by all manner of angels, there is a glowing figure that seems to radiate infinite serenity. He motions me forward. I advance. He bends down to whisper in my ear. "Plastics," he says. And then I wake up.

Q: What does that mean?

A: I have no idea.

Q: There must be a psychological aspect to what you are going through. How you are handling all this?

A: I believe in what I once read: "Life is a club where they won't stand for squawks, where they deal you only one hand, and you must sit in. So even if the cards are cold and marked by the hand of fate, play up, play up like a gentleman and a sport."

Q: Who wrote that?

A: Nathanael West.

Q: Who's he?

A: He's a blogger from Paramus, N.J.

Q: Is there anything we can do for you? Anything you need?

A: Pity.

Q: Pity?

A: Or an iPad. I can't decide which.

Q: I hear iPads are pretty cool.

A. Yeah, but pity is cool, too. I could call up somebody who never returns my calls, for instance, and it would go like this:

Aide: Madame Secretary, Roger Simon is calling.

Secretary Clinton: You know I don't talk to morons. Hang up on that geek.

Aide: But Madame Secretary, he has no feet now.

Secretary Clinton: My God, put him through immediately! And find a classified document I can leak to him!

Q: That's revolting. There are tens of millions of disabled people in this country who refuse all forms of pity.

A: Good. There will be more for me. Also, I am thinking about product endorsements. Flying commercial in a wheelchair can really be a pain — but if, for instance, Northrop Grumman would make any of its fine aircraft available to me, I would be really grateful.

Q: You're out of your mind.

A: Have I ever mentioned how sleek and powerful the B-2 Spirit is, to say nothing of the EA-6B Prowler with its wing-mounted jamming pods? Talk about a great company.

Q: I sense much of your braggadocio is designed to mask your fear — your fear of not knowing what life holds for you next.

A: Au contraire, I know exactly what life holds for me next.

Q: What?

A: Parking in all those nifty "handicapped only" spots.

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