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May 20, 2013
Melissa Healy: Genetic copies of living people from embryos no longer science fiction
Jewz in the Newz by Nate Bloom : Jews Inducted into Rock Hall of Fame; Anton Yelchin co-stars in New "Trek" film; Kutcher (but not Kunis) visits Israel; Jewish TV Star Praises Jewish Rap Star
The Kosher Gourmet by Cathy Pollak: WARNING: This WALNUT CAKE WITH PRALINE FROSTING, perfect for afternoon coffee, is addicting
May 13, 2013
Rabbi Nathan Lopes Cardozo: Why the giving of the document that would permanently change the world could only be done in desolation
David G. Savage: Church-state, literally? Supreme Court weighing public school graduation in a church
May 10, 2013
Rabbi Berel Wein: Be all that you should be
May 8, 2013
Peter Ford: Why China is welcoming both Israel's Netanyahu and Palestinians' Abbas
Warren Richey: Obama administration quietly backs out of appeal over new contraceptive mandate
Fred Weir: At Kerry-Putin meeting, US-Russia relations thaw --- a tad
The Kosher Gourmet by Leela Cyd Ross : Almost too pretty to eat, this colorful salad with Sicilian inspiration will tickle the taste buds and delight your visual sensibility
May 6, 2013
May 3, 2013
Kids, kittens the Same? With employee perks at struggling Internet pioneer Yahoo! it's hard to tell
Sandy Kleffman: Artificial kidney offers hope to patients tethered to a dialysis machine
April 29, 2013
Roy Gutman: Poland's new Jewish museum celebrates life, doesn't revisit Holocaust
Mark Clayton: Terrorism in America: Is US missing a chance to learn from failed plots?
Kim Murphy: Boston Bomber's 'Svengali' Revealed
Pete Spotts: Tiny satellites + cellphones = cheaper 'eyes in the sky' for NASA
April 26, 2013
Clifford D. May: Defense in the Age of Jihadist Terrorism
Sharon Palmer, R.D.: How to feel your best -- with plenty of energy, a healthy weight and optimal mental and physical function -- without driving yourself batty
April 24, 2013
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Jewish World Review
Don't we all cheat at the game of life?
By
Jim Mullen
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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Floyd Landis, the disqualified winner of the 2006 Tour de France bicycle race, has admitted that he was taking performance-enhancing drugs. For those of you who don't follow the sport, it's a three-week race with cyclists biking more than 100 miles a day, many of those stages taking place in the mountains. It's a race that makes the Ironman competitions seem like a lazy afternoon of lawn darts and croquet. Floyd Landis won the Tour de France with, for all practical purposes, a broken hip. I watched it the day he pulled away from the lead group and rode straight up a mountain. It was one of the most astounding feats of endurance ever seen.
Now that he's admitted taking drugs, I just have two questions. Where can I get some of that stuff Floyd was taking, and why aren't they giving it to everyone? What are we, stupid? They keep saying it's bad for you, that it will stunt your growth, make you impotent. Yet every night we can watch athletes who have admitted taking PEDs and Human Growth Hormones. They're playing pro ball long after their peers have dropped out, they're dating starlets, they're making babies and tons of money. Gee, I hate to see them wreck their lives like that. What were they thinking?
Whoever makes PEDs should be advertising them every night on the news.
"Tired, sluggish, don't have the energy to fill the dishwasher? Ask your doctor about Makesmefeelgood. Warning, may cause high energy levels, increased attention from the opposite sex, a longer life span and a raise in pay. Should you experience any of these symptoms, call your doctor immediately and ask for more." Isn't this the exact same thing the "legal" drugs claim to do?
Calling something a performance-enhancing drug makes it sound unsportsmanlike. But isn't food a performance enhancer? It would be hard to play football if you weren't allowed to eat any protein for a few weeks before the game. Food obviously boosts an athlete's performance, yet the International Olympic Committee refuses to ban it. Or should the athlete with the healthier diet be banned while the one who eats bacon-flavored ice cream gets to play? What about water? Doesn't that up your game? Yet they give it to all the athletes. At marathons, runners are encouraged to drink performance-enhancing water. Those good-for-nothing cheats.
Don't all the years Floyd Landis trained and competed count for something? You could shoot me full of crack cocaine and amphetamines and zap me with a cattle prod and I still couldn't have done what he did in the Tour de France. I couldn't make it up that hill in a car. Maybe he wouldn't have won the race without the drugs, but it's not like he coasted to the win. While he was out there training day after day, riding thousands of miles a year, others sat around the house eating snack chips and calling sports radio talk shows to complain about athletes on dope.
"I've lost all respect for them," says the guy who can't climb a flight of stairs without stopping to smoke another cigarette.
These are the same fans who go to baseball and football games and eat platefuls of unhealthy nachos washed down with staggering amounts of beer while sitting around for four hours with no more exercise than going to the bathroom. Wow, what a bunch of health nuts they are. They would never use dope. Except that stuff they take for their cholesterol, the stuff they take for their diabetes, the stuff they take for their lower-back pain, the stuff they take for their gout and the stuff they take for their ED. Isn't Viagra a performance-enhancing drug? Isn't that cheating?
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
Comment by clicking here.
Jim Mullen is the author of "It Takes a Village Idiot: Complicating the Simple Life" and "Baby's First Tattoo."
Previously:
What happens when I forget where Google is?
Don't let the doorman hit you on the way out
Picasso fiasco
Purple (hair) Daze
Let me hear your body talk
Working from work
Babies deserve clean restrooms, too
3-year-old bear-killers are a thing of the past
Money-making ideas on the fly
Collecting and hoarding
Chain of fools
Please come pick up your acting awards, ESPN commentators, you've earned them
You've been superpoked by the U.S. gov't
e-Readin', e-Writin' and e-Rithmatic
A pose by any other name
Warning: Column contains 2010 spoilers
He loves only gold, only gold
Think about direction, wonder why …
Flushing your money down a diamond-studded toilet
More like wack Friday
The good, the ad and the ugly
The desert of the real
Let books be large and in charge
I was insulting people way before the Internet
GPS drill sergeant: Left, right, left!
Butterfly in the sky, you make winds go twice as high
Music to my ears it's not
You don't light up my life
Fair or not: Country living is far from Little House
A parable for the ages
Top 100 Cable news stories of the century
Green dumb
A developing story
Thinking outside the lunch box
What's good for the goose is good for the scanner
Newspapers will survive, but network TV?
A really big show of generation gaps
When pigs flu
The reports of our decline have been greatly exaggerated
Mergers and admonitions
Invest in gold: little, yellow, different
Stuck in Folsom Penthouse
Collecting karma
Setting loose the creative juice
It's all in the numbers
You're damaging your brain with practical skills
The real rat pack
The unspeakable luxury of the Park-O-Matic
Gross-ery shopping
© 2009, NEA
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