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May 23, 2012
Tony Pugh: More private colleges offering tuition discounts
Mary Beth Franklin: How to Choose the Right Annuity for You
Tina Susman: The wig wasn't enough: Man gets 13 years for posing as his dead mom
The Kosher Gourmet by Emma Christensen:A simple way to do fish right
May 22, 2012
Warren Richey: Can US group challenge overseas surveillance act? Supreme Court to decide
Thomas M. Anderson: Walking Away From a Mortgage
The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon: Enjoy a celebration of the most rich and layered flavors: Black bean, sweet potato and quinoa chili
May 21, 2012
Mark Clayton: Cybersecurity: How US utilities passed up chance to protect their networks
Howard LaFranchi: NATO summit: Who will foot the bill for long-term Afghanistan security?
Chris Farrell : Earn Dividends in Emerging Markets with This WisdomTree ETF
Stephen Whiteside, Ph.D. : Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: Social anxiety disorder --- or just shy?
Guy Jackson : Victim's father regrets death of Lockerbie bomber
The Kosher Gourmet by Mario Batali: Famed chef's veal shoulder farsumagru: A festive meat course for late spring
May 18, 2012
Rabbi Berel Wein: Striving: The People of the Book's Book for (All of) the People
Steven Goldberg: 5 Great Stock Picks and the Exchange-Traded Fund that Owns Them
Mary Pickett, M.D.: Ask the Harvard Experts: Don't be forced into gluten-free lifestyle based merely on a doctor's false-positive test
The Kosher Gourmet by Carolyn Malcoun: DIY healthy lunchbox treats: HOMEMADE FRUIT BARS for kids and brown-bagging adults alike
May 17, 2012
Warren Richey: Teacher fired for being unwed and pregnant can sue religious school, court rules
Josh Mitnick: Netanyahu's 'centrist' coalition is already proving it's anything but
Steven Goldberg: Earn Dividends in Emerging Markets with This WisdomTree ETF
Amina Khan: Research links coffee to lower death rates
The Kosher Gourmet by Faith Duran : Cheesy Potato Breakfast Casserole with Cheddar and Sun-Dried Tomatoes
May 16, 2012
Carmen Terzic, M.D., Ph.D. : Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: A variety of exercises can help improve balance
Melissa Healy: National strategy on Alzheimer's disease aims to halt it by 2025
The Kosher Gourmet by Joyce White : GOODNESS GRACIOUS: GREENS! 4 winning recipes that are no longer just for down-home folks (Includes expert tips & techniques)
May 15, 2012
Kristen Chick: Obama administration resumes arms sales to Bahrain despite serious unresolved human rights issues. Activists feel abandoned
Pat Mertz Esswein: Homes are now affordable again and mortgage rates are low. What you need to know before you buy
Kathy Kristof: Our Practical Investor Fights Inflation with These 6 Investments
Sue Hubbard, M.D.: The Kid's Doctor: Lactose intolerant young child? Check again
The Kosher Gourmet by Kathy Hunt: Spread a Little Excitement with EXOTIC CONDIMENTS (4 RECIPES)
May 14, 2012
Lisa Gerstner: How to Protect Your Identity, Finances If You Lose Your Phone
Harvard Health Letters: Heart disease and dementia
The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon: MANGO COCONUT OAT MORNING MUFFINS are a bright but hearty delight
May 11, 2012
Jessica L. Anderson: Get the Best Deal on a Used Car
Jett Stone: Forget face-lifts and fake knees. Scientists have seen the fountain of youth --- and it's broccoli
The Kosher Gourmet by Chef Mario Batali: The famed chef's vegetable dish that tastes true to the season: FAVAS AND SUGAR SNAP PEAS WITH POTATOES AND TARRAGON
May 10, 2012
Sergei L. Loiko: Putin sends warning to U.S., NATO in Victory Day speech at Red Square
Mary Rourke: How being a 'mentch' got Vidal Sasoon his start and fighting in Israel's War of Independence provided him with confidence and a strong sense of his own identity
Jeff Bertolucci: Get Home Phone Service for Less Than $10 a Month
The Kosher Gourmet by Betty Rosbottom: Gleaming with its golden, crimson, and snowy white hues, this silken smooth and creamy STRAWBERRY ORANGE TRIFLE looks impressive, but is easy to prepare
May 9, 2012
Sharon Palmer, R.D. How you can reduce your risk -- or delay -- chronic diseases associated with aging
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Jewish World Review
Just point the way and we'll march
By
Chris Erskine
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Sometimes, I feel like the Pied Piper of kids. Children tend to follow me for no reason. One time, at Big Bear, I turned to find 15 little snow urchins trailing me down the slopes. "Get away! Get away!" I shouted, before realizing they were all mine.
Well, most of them anyway.
I love a parade, so I used this odd trait recently with a bunch of Cub Scouts, mouthy kids with a penchant for dressing in military-style outfits, as if that conveys some sort of authority or something. We were unit No. 70 in the Memorial Day parade, but we don't like lines. So we waited patiently near the beginning for our slot in the parade to come to us, then promptly ran the other way. Almost a week later, I still have no idea why.
Could've been we spooked, the way you see schools of small Caribbean fish quickly change directions. Suddenly, the parade was headed in one direction, and then we were headed in the other. Confusion reigned, and I did what I always do in crises — I stumbled a little. When I regained my balance, I shouted, "Men, follow me!" and most of them did, except for two of the fathers, who I think headed off for leisurely breakfast and maybe a round of golf.
But the crisis wasn't over, for we had to catch up to our spot in the parade — a little sliver of sunlight between a herd of horses and a live band on the back of a truck. "Scouts coming through!" I yelled to some spectators along the curb, and they parted as crowds will when you use the right tone of voice. In no time, we were part of a parade.
Yep, as I said, I love a parade. I've viewed them from Miami to L.A. I've always thought that the best parades are the ones you happen to be part of, so I'd rate this the greatest parade that was ever held.
There were marching bands and politicians and pretty girls in convertibles with concrete smiles. There were dog rescue organizations and hundreds and hundreds of preschoolers and their parents. I don't know what business a bunch of preschoolers have in a parade. In our little town, there are more people in the parade than those who actually view it. One year, they considered busing in spectators from other states, but that proved too costly. So we mostly go with what we've got.
The parade began with a big rumbling flyover by one of those planes that's so big it can barely turn. Basically, because it can't turn, it only can fly around the world in a straight line. This would be cost-prohibitive to anything but the American military.
As I said, it is an excellent parade. Our town, as you may have sensed, is populated and run almost exclusively by opinionated, high-maintenance women. If you want a parade done right, you just collect a few of them and turn them loose. That's what we've done, and the parade is almost always a roaring success.
This year Pack 515 took part; that was us. The rock band on the truck in front of us played the same song over and over. Within about 10 minutes, my head had begun to swell to ridiculous proportions. If you've seen my head at its normal size, you can just imagine how big that must've been. Several people along the route clapped with glee, thinking they were witnessing one of those Macy's-style Snoopy balloons.
So to counteract the repetition, we began to make our own music, specifically chanting, "FIVE-ONE-FIVE" over and over again as we waltzed down the parade route.
"FIVE-ONE-FIVE! FIVE-ONE-FIVE! FIVE-ONE-FIVE!" You get the idea. For obvious reasons, this was a big hit with the scouts, who, at age 7, have a good appreciation for screaming spectacles. It also gave them something to do in addition to running up my heels with their razor scooters.
Yes, once we got going, everything went well. Like those big planes, Pack 515 works best in straight lines, so you can point us in one direction and just turn us loose, and we will walk clear around the world.
We'll walk till someone orders us to stop or we pass an interesting-looking bar at happy hour. In my mind, all hours are happy hours and all bars are pretty interesting. I think the other dads feel much the same way.
The little cubbies? They're holding up well. One got his fingers stuck in his mouth. Another ate my car keys. With 7-year-olds, incidents like that are bound to happen.
Follow me, men.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
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Previously:
An enchanted diorama in the 'burbs
America's next top Mama
Fires and gas leaks aside, we're just swell
Woozy on the lido deck of life
He's tickled to visit the doctor
A treat that could eat you
Making sense of March Madness
Save the queen, from Biden's motorcade
His daughter's becoming an adult, but is that a good thing?
Thin mints and fungo bats
You must be this tall to enter the ark
© 2010, Los Angeles Times Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services
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