In this issue

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review May 4, 2007 / 16 Iyar, 5767

If what's inside counts, why not nurture it?

By Lori Borgman

Lori Borgman
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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | USA Today is reporting that Kelly Ripa's bellybutton was airbrushed from an outie to an innie for the cover of Shape magazine. It's good to know, isn't it? I know I'll sleep better tonight.

America Ferrera, the star of "Ugly Betty" the popular television show that stresses internal beauty more than external beauty, has had a royal makeover for her cover spot on W magazine.

They gave the lovable Latina voluminous hair, luscious lips, smoky eyes and a come hither look. So much for all that noise about "it's what's on the inside that counts."

The American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery reports that the biggest rise in women seeking cosmetic procedures comes from women under 35. Twentysomethings are seeking botox.

You have to wonder what the ratio is between the time and money we invest in our external selves and the time and money we invest in our internal selves.

Hair and make-up: 40 minutes.

Personal reflection: None.

Treadmill at the gym: 30 minutes three times a week.

Assessing important relationships: Not now.

My mom kept a calorie-counting book that she kept in the kitchen drawer when I was about 12 years old. I vividly remember the little book being printed on gray paper with a drawing of a lady on the front. Long eyelashes, turned up nose, perfect chin and hair piled high with dangling curls. It was a somewhat swooshy profile in purple ink.

On the inside back page was a personality quiz you were to take each day after you tallied your calories. Calorie-counting and character-counting; not a bad combo.

In the evenings, my mom would sometimes sit on one end of the couch and I would sit on the other, and she would run through the little quiz with me.

"Were you the first to smile at someone today?"

"Were you the first to say hello to someone today?" "If you saw someone new, did you introduce yourself?"

"Did you say something encouraging to someone today?"

"Were you kind today?"

"Were you cheerful today?"

It made me feel grown up to know my mother asked me the same questions that she asked herself. It also made me feel as though I had the possibility of one day becoming as lovely as the pretty lady on the cover, although without the purple lines.

There were about 15 questions, and the correct answer was always yes. I fudged occasionally to help myself along in my mother's eyes, but I think she fudged on her calorie count, so in retrospect, we were even.

The questions were a good inventory, in that they put the focus on others.

They were benchmarks of thoughtfulness, courtesy and consideration.

We're not oriented to focus on others today. Well, we may focus on others but it is usually in a voyeuristic innie/outie bellybutton sort of way. For the most part, our checklists are primarily about us: Me, myself and I, the ultimate shallow trio.

When our daughters were in high school, they began placing a small card with a scripted word each day in a pretty clip on their desks. There were about 10 in all; tenderness, gentleness, loyal, loving, kind, honest. I'd like to say they got the idea from me, but I'd be fudging again.

Wherever the idea came from, any female possessing the capability of seeing and developing her inner self as well as her outer self is rather, well, lovely.

The purple lady would entirely approve.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

JWR contributor Lori Borgman is the author of , most recently, "Pass the Faith, Please" (Click HERE to purchase. Sales help fund JWR.) and I Was a Better Mother Before I Had Kids To comment, please click here. To visit her website click here.


© 2007, Lori Borgman