In this issue

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review May 25, 2005 /16 Iyar, 5765

A new year, but the same yearbook

By Marybeth Hicks

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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Somewhere in the dizzying pace of May, everything bloomed — dogwoods, forsythias, rhododendrons and azaleas, and among the branches hanging heavy with blossoms of pink and red and yellow, the gentle draping of toilet paper.

Toilet paper: The sure sign spring is in the air; the prank that connects baby boomer parents and their "echo boomer" progeny; the absolute proof that there's no such thing as a new idea.

I'm thinking about the timeless appeal of tossing rolls of fluffy white toilet paper through the trees as I drive through my neighborhood, thankful that my daughter hasn't attracted the kind of attention that would force us to spend a Saturday picking the stuff off our lawn. A few of our neighbors have their work cut out for them.

This week, just as sure as there is toilet paper in the trees and restaurants will be filled with nervous prom dates trying to remember what their mothers said about multiple forks, teens from coast to coast will engage in that timeless act of self-assessment — opening the yearbook.

It's a hopeful moment. Fresh from a giant cardboard box, still carrying the scent of printer's ink and binding glue, its spine not yet cracked nor its pages marred by the smearing of ballpoint pen, a new yearbook presents pages of possibility.

When they open it, every teen does the same thing — they turn to the index to see how many times their photo appears in the book. We all did this, even if we won't admit it.

The number of times your photo appears in the book speaks volumes about popularity and social status. Too many listings means you're a habitual "joiner" whose photo is included in every group shot from French club and debate team to pep band and government club.

Only one listing in the index means you're obscure — if it weren't for your official class photo you might be forgotten.

Somewhere in between are the popular students — the ones who pose for group shots while working on the homecoming float in the fall or in front of a snow scene at winter ball. They're always in the right place at the right time.

For most teens, the yearbook committee has the power to define the high school experience. Somewhere, hidden behind the stacks in the library or at the top of the stands in the football stadium, someone holding a camera zooms in on your blemished face, your "hat hair," your pants brushing dangerously close to the tops of your sneakers.

They catch you in a candid moment you recall as loads of fun, but which, when seen through an unforgiving 35mm eye, includes something in your teeth you cannot deny. As if high school isn't hard enough.

And then, someone — your best friend or the obnoxious guy from chemistry class or maybe the girl who laughs really loudly in the halls — grabs your yearbook and writes the first message, forever marking the volume as yours alone.

Yearbook messages are as timeless as toilet paper. They're the same from year to year and generation to generation. They say "Have a great summer" and "It was great talking through a whole year of physics" and "I'm glad I got the chance to get to know you — not."

They remind you of things you did that you would rather forget ("I always loved how you mouthed off to Mr. Schultz"), of fights you had with friends ("We had our ups and downs") and things that set you apart ("You were great in the play").

They promise countless get-togethers in the summer and lifelong friendships beyond high school. They beg you to "Remember me always" and "Keep in touch."

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Yet somewhere in the trite, predictable messages scrawled across the inside covers of your yearbook are the gems — the verses written from one heart to another that somehow transcend the span of time between the 18-year-old you and the middle-aged adult you became. They're the messages that ring true years later because they were written by that rare friend who stays with you from year to year and reunion to reunion.

My daughter looks at my yearbooks with confounded curiosity. The era in which I went to high school — the 1970s — is a decade so remote it's the subject of a TV sitcom. Not to mention, it's impossible for her to imagine that I was once a teenager with goofy friends who did silly things together. Mostly when she scans the pages she laughs at our hairstyles.

But when I look at her yearbooks, I'm reminded that high school is much the same for every generation. Armed with only the insight of a teenager, we all think we're profound when we're really just sentimental; we're convinced our teenaged reality is an arbiter of things to come, when really it's just a building block from which we reach the next step on the journey.

May is waning, making way for the bright warm days of June and another summer. If I recall correctly, this is about the time my sophomore daughter will realize her high school days are passing all too quickly.

Then again, is there anything sweeter than a summer spent dreaming about all the things you still might discover in the pages of the yearbooks yet to come?

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JWR contributor Marybeth Hicks, a wife of 17 years and mother of four children, lives in the Midwest. She uses her column to share her perspective on issues and experiences that shape families nationwide. To comment, please click here.


© 2005, Marybeth Hicks