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May 22, 2012
Warren Richey: Can US group challenge overseas surveillance act? Supreme Court to decide
Thomas M. Anderson: Walking Away From a Mortgage
The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon: Enjoy a celebration of the most rich and layered flavors: Black bean, sweet potato and quinoa chili
May 21, 2012
Mark Clayton: Cybersecurity: How US utilities passed up chance to protect their networks
Howard LaFranchi: NATO summit: Who will foot the bill for long-term Afghanistan security?
Chris Farrell : Earn Dividends in Emerging Markets with This WisdomTree ETF
Stephen Whiteside, Ph.D. : Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: Social anxiety disorder --- or just shy?
Guy Jackson : Victim's father regrets death of Lockerbie bomber
The Kosher Gourmet by Mario Batali: Famed chef's veal shoulder farsumagru: A festive meat course for late spring
May 18, 2012
Rabbi Berel Wein: Striving: The People of the Book's Book for (All of) the People
Steven Goldberg: 5 Great Stock Picks and the Exchange-Traded Fund that Owns Them
Mary Pickett, M.D.: Ask the Harvard Experts: Don't be forced into gluten-free lifestyle based merely on a doctor's false-positive test
The Kosher Gourmet by Carolyn Malcoun: DIY healthy lunchbox treats: HOMEMADE FRUIT BARS for kids and brown-bagging adults alike
May 17, 2012
Warren Richey: Teacher fired for being unwed and pregnant can sue religious school, court rules
Josh Mitnick: Netanyahu's 'centrist' coalition is already proving it's anything but
Steven Goldberg: Earn Dividends in Emerging Markets with This WisdomTree ETF
Amina Khan: Research links coffee to lower death rates
The Kosher Gourmet by Faith Duran : Cheesy Potato Breakfast Casserole with Cheddar and Sun-Dried Tomatoes
May 16, 2012
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Melissa Healy: National strategy on Alzheimer's disease aims to halt it by 2025
The Kosher Gourmet by Joyce White : GOODNESS GRACIOUS: GREENS! 4 winning recipes that are no longer just for down-home folks (Includes expert tips & techniques)
May 15, 2012
Kristen Chick: Obama administration resumes arms sales to Bahrain despite serious unresolved human rights issues. Activists feel abandoned
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Kathy Kristof: Our Practical Investor Fights Inflation with These 6 Investments
Sue Hubbard, M.D.: The Kid's Doctor: Lactose intolerant young child? Check again
The Kosher Gourmet by Kathy Hunt: Spread a Little Excitement with EXOTIC CONDIMENTS (4 RECIPES)
May 14, 2012
Lisa Gerstner: How to Protect Your Identity, Finances If You Lose Your Phone
Harvard Health Letters: Heart disease and dementia
The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon: MANGO COCONUT OAT MORNING MUFFINS are a bright but hearty delight
May 11, 2012
Jessica L. Anderson: Get the Best Deal on a Used Car
Jett Stone: Forget face-lifts and fake knees. Scientists have seen the fountain of youth --- and it's broccoli
The Kosher Gourmet by Chef Mario Batali: The famed chef's vegetable dish that tastes true to the season: FAVAS AND SUGAR SNAP PEAS WITH POTATOES AND TARRAGON
May 10, 2012
Sergei L. Loiko: Putin sends warning to U.S., NATO in Victory Day speech at Red Square
Mary Rourke: How being a 'mentch' got Vidal Sasoon his start and fighting in Israel's War of Independence provided him with confidence and a strong sense of his own identity
Jeff Bertolucci: Get Home Phone Service for Less Than $10 a Month
The Kosher Gourmet by Betty Rosbottom: Gleaming with its golden, crimson, and snowy white hues, this silken smooth and creamy STRAWBERRY ORANGE TRIFLE looks impressive, but is easy to prepare
May 9, 2012
Sharon Palmer, R.D. How you can reduce your risk -- or delay -- chronic diseases associated with aging
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Jewish World Review
April 13, 2005
/ 4 Nisan, 5765
Audit red flags
By
Brad Dickson
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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
This time of year many Americans fret about the third worst fate known to humankind (next to being incarcerated in a Turkish prison or receiving a late night call from Pat O'Brien): a tax audit. Thus, to help the American public avoid the dreaded A-word, I have compiled this list of potential audit red flags.
1) "Deducting your pets." My accountant says many Americans actually try to deduct their pets, which would be the first practical use ever for a cat. However, the I.R.S., utilizing the latest ultra high-tech, scam-targeting technology, has specially programmed computers designed to root out any return taking a deduction for a "Mr. Whiskers."
2) "Living above one's means." When you claim an income of $12,000 per year and your pad is a 5,000 square foot mansion with indoor lap pool and you own a Ferrari, those things are all okay. However, if you recently paid cash for a full tank of gasoline or a grand latte at Starbucks, that's going to raise some IRS eyebrows.
3) Attempting to deduct a losing bar bet for the time an inebriated guy named Buck claimed he could drink a glass of vodka through his nose, and you said he couldn't, and it turned out he could red flag.
4) "Questionable requests for extensions." Everyone knows the tax filing deadline is mid April, but it's possible to file for an extension.. The following requests will elicit IRS scrutiny:
A). Filing for an extension, "until my tax preparer gets out of the slammer."
B). Filing for an extension, "until pigs fly."
C). Filing for the "Dan Rather Extension." (All the documents you turn in are fake.)
5. "Claiming a home office deduction." In order to take the home office deduction one room of your house must be used exclusively for business. When the IRS investigator shows up and sees your "home office" consists of a yellow legal pad atop a karaoke machine, adjacent an indoor batting cage, and a Jacuzzi with an inflatable woman, you may have some splainin' to do.
6) When the IRS catches one small infraction, and you ask if you can "take a mulligan" on the entire return red flag.
7). "Claiming the neighbor kids as dependants." Although they spend 90% of their time on your front porch hawking Girl Scout cookies, Cub Scout light bulbs, every-magazine-known-to-man, "Brownie Timeshares" and "Indian Guide aluminum siding" you cannot deduct the junior Willy Lomans from next door. (Question: what do you do in Indian Guides these days open little mini casinos?)
8) "Depreciating your spouse." We all get older, and frequently grumpier, and some of us lose our hair. However, the IRS takes a dim view of writing off your husband or wife's decline. And besides, with age comes wisdom.
9) On the portion of the tax form where it asks you to "List all income from tips" and you write, "HA-HA-HA-HA!! THAT'S A GOOD ONE. YOU GOT ANY MORE FUNNY JOKES?" you likely are in for an audit.
10) "Instead of stapling your W-2 form to your return you're so disorganized you staple your grocery list." (Florida residents only: you're so confused you staple a ballot with a vote for Al Gore to your return.)
There are literally hundreds more things you can do to trigger an audit.
At all cost avoid the following: Enclosing a dollar bill with your return so the head of the IRS can "buy a heart on Ebay;" drawing a 'sad face' inside the zeroes on 1040; and, replacing the last page of your tax form with a chain letter, informing the IRS that, "John Smith failed to send this to twenty-five friends and was found with an axe through his nose."
The important thing is to save all your receipts. I religiously saved every significant receipt in an old shoe box for seventeen years. Unfortunately, when I was audited I grabbed the wrong shoe box, and when I got to the IRS office all I had to show for my itemized deductions from 1990 1994 was a pair of brown penny loafers. By the time I left the office I still had the loafers, but the I.R.S. had the pennies.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
JWR contributor Brad Dickson was a monologue staff writer for The Tonight Show With Jay Leno for 13 years. He's presently developing a network television pilot. Comment by clicking here.
Things not to say at the Charles-Camilla wedding!
BREAKING NEWS: We've gone berserk!
Dan Rather’s retirement speech
Rooster rumble a cockamamie idea?
© 2005, Brad Dickson
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