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December 2, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review March 17, 2014 / 15 Adar II, 5774

An Open Letter to the Sandy Hook Mass Killer's Father

By Diane Dimond




JewishWorldReview.com | "With hindsight, I know Adam would have killed me in a heartbeat, if he'd had the chance ... The reason he shot Nancy four times was one for each of us: one for Nancy; one for him; one for Ryan; one for me." — Peter Lanza, father of mass killer Adam Lanza

Dear Mr. Lanza,

First, may I tell you how deeply sorry I am for the loss of your son, Adam? As a mother myself I cannot imagine my child committing suicide and the never-ending pain that action must bring with it. Here's hoping you know how many people have prayed for your family since the terrible tragedy in December 2012.

I'm writing to say how glad I am that you finally spoke publicly about your youngest child. Like you, many of us hope that speaking out about your son's mental illness will help other struggling families with afflicted children. I wonder how many of them fear their children might turn dangerous, too.

While reading the New Yorker article about you, I had to smile when you described Adam as, "just a normal little weird kid," who was intellectually curious and loving. Then, I felt sadness for you and your ex-wife, Nancy, as the writer described Adam's increasing self-isolation — smelling things that weren't there, washing his hands obsessively and his anti-social behaviors. When you had to tell his elementary school teachers to watch him for seizures, I guess you knew that Adam was more than a little "weird."

From reading the story, it seems Adam's 2005 diagnosis of Asperger's syndrome gave you some hope of finding meaningful solutions for your son. I realize you and your ex-wife had separated back in 2001 but I was glad to read that you stayed close to 13-year-old Adam and his big brother, Ryan.

So what the hell happened, Mr. Lanza? Why, on the morning Adam walked into his mother's bedroom and pumped four bullets into her face and then gunned down 26 innocent children and their teachers at Sandy Hook Elementary had you not spoken to him in two years? I don't mean to be disrespectful here, but you were the grownup in this equation — the male figure in your son's life — and you let weeks, months and years go by without communicating face-to-face with your obviously troubled son?

I read that he was angry with you after a dispute about how many classes he should take. That was all it took to shut him down — forever?

You said when Adam refused to see you, "I was hurt. I never expected that I would never talk to him again. I thought it was a matter of when." But two whole years went by!

You knew Adam never accepted the Asperger's diagnosis and he was prone to fanciful thinking. He wanted to take college courses. He wanted to join the military. You knew your wife had a lifelong hobby of shooting and that there were guns in the home. If you weren't responsible for Adam, who, besides his now dead mother, was?

I'm not asking to be rude; I'm asking to understand how a parent can become so clouded in their thinking about a mentally ill child's behavior that they allow that youngster to dictate the rules of the house. How does that even happen?

Sadly, I have to assume that similarly burdened parents are reacting the same way when they can't find good quality mental health care solutions for their kids.

The author of the article, Andrew Solomon, wrote about you that, "He constantly thinks about what he could have done differently and wishes he had pushed harder to see Adam."

I truly wish you had pushed harder too, Mr. Lanza. If only you had gone back to that big beautiful yellow home nestled behind the knoll in Newtown, Conn., you might have noticed, for example, that your 20-year-old, 6-foot-tall son weighed only 112 pounds at the end.


I checked the official Body Mass Index and was astounded to learn that Adam's BMI was 15.2. People in the "underweight" category have a BMI of 18.5. Your son fell into the "starvation" and "anorexia" group. A study I read says prolonged semi-starvation brings on severe emotional instability, hysteria, anti-social behavior and depression — conditions it sounds like Adam already suffered. I have to believe if you had only seen him in that haunted-looking state you would have done something, right?

If you had gone to visit Adam during those last two years you also might have noticed that he had covered the windows in his bedroom with thick black plastic. You might have noticed his stack of violent video games, the newspaper articles he collected about school shootings or the photos he had of dead humans wrapped in plastic. A check of his computer might have brought up his spreadsheet about mass murders, the rights of pedophiles or the selfies he took while holding guns to his head. Your ex-wife might have finally admitted that Adam was refusing to eat or talk to her, communicating only via email from behind his bedroom door.

I'm sure you've probably read that lengthy report by the Connecticut State's Attorney's office about your son's mass murder, Mr. Lanza. It concludes Adam was a kid immersed in his own spiraling and destructive hell and your ex-wife was intent on trying to manage it all herself. So, how did you envision your son's future?

You got it right, I fear, when you described Adam's final fatal actions by saying, "You can't get any more evil." You wished he had never been born and admitted, "How much do I beat up on myself about the fact that he's my son? A lot."

I am truly sorry for your loss, Mr. Lanza, but it is the parents of those 20 murdered children and the families of the dead teachers I mourn for the most. They had everything to live for. Inaction by both you and Nancy and the nation's mental health system ensured Adam was lost long ago.

I pray that this nation wakes up and comes to the realization that we either help the helpless like Adam or be condemned to suffer their sometimes inexplicable and explosive wrath.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

Investigative journalist and syndicated columnist Diane Dimond has covered all manner of celebrity and pop culture stories.

Diane Dimond Archives

© 2014, Creators Syndicate.

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