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April 19th, 2024

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Least Competent Criminals

News of the Weird

By News of the Weird

Published Feb. 24, 2021

Least Competent Criminals

Edner Flores, 34, entered a PNC Bank branch in Chicago's Humboldt Park neighborhood on Jan. 27 and allegedly tried to rob it by handing a teller a note stating that he wanted $10,000, with "no die (sic) packs," and that he was armed, according to a federal criminal complaint.

The teller activated a silent alarm and the man to fill out a blue withdrawal slip, which he did, then asked for his ATM card.

The helpful Flores instead produced a temporary Illinois state ID card, authorities said. WMAQ-TV reported police arrived while Flores was still at the window, arrested him and found a knife in his jacket, according to a police report. [NBC Chicago, 1/28/2021]

Women changing in the locker room at Onelife Fitness in Stafford, Virginia, were unhurt on Jan. 30 when Brian Anthony Joe, 41, fell through the ceiling, according to the Stafford County Sheriff's Office, landing on one of them.

Joe, who fell about 10 feet, the sheriff said, was also uninjured, and the New York Post reported the women held him there in the locker room until authorities arrived to arrest him on charges of burglary, vandalism and peeping. [NY Post, 1/31/2021]