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April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review

Putting the fun back in dysfunctional

By Jim Mullen




http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Gloria's got a 16-year-old grandchild who dresses like a streetwalker. And her mother, Robin, buys her clothes.

"When the kid is not on the phone, she's got those little earplugs in her ears. Her brother is 24 and lives in the basement. I think Robin leaves plates of food for him at the cellar door. I don't think she's seen him in five years.

"The funny thing is, Robin thinks Amos and I were bad parents -- like she's done such a fine job. I'll agree that we were not the best parents, but it's not our job to be the best parents. It's not a competition. It's our job just to be the parents. What's that comedienne's name? The one who used to be funny. Roseanne? She used to say that 'if my kids are alive by they time they're 18, I did my job.'

"Robin thinks I was a lousy parent because I made her say 'please' and 'thank you' and I made her go to school every day and checked her report cards and made sure she did her homework and wouldn't let her date until she was 16 and I didn't buy her a brand-new car when she turned 16 and I wouldn't spend $300 on her prom dress and rent a limousine for her and all her little friends. She sure wasn't going to raise her kids the way I did.


"No, I didn't go to every basketball game and track meet, and I rolled my eyes at the thought of a first-grade 'graduation,' but I did pack her lunch every day and make sure she had clean clothes to wear. All of which makes me a horrible person. Winner of the 'Mommie Dearest' award for fine parenting. What was I thinking?

"So, of course, she gets married to the first person that doesn't look at her funny so she can get out of her stupid, evil mother's house. Now she's on husband number three and her own children are a mess. And guess what? Somehow, that's all my fault.

"Every time I hear someone talk about a dysfunctional family, I want to scream, 'But nobody has a functional family!' It's not possible. Someone's always out of step. Remember Jimmy Carter's brother Billy? The Kennedys and the Rockefellers have all had their problem children. And adults. If the Queen of England can't keep her children and grandchildren in line, with all her money and servants and nannies, how are we supposed to do it? You don't have to dig too deep to find addictive, self-destructive people in any family. The words 'step-sister' or 'half-brother' or 'first wife' or 'first husband' ring a bell? It can't mean 'good times.'

"Some people think we should visit a therapist. Tell you what. Let's meet the therapist's family first. What are the therapist's kids like? What is their relationship with their parents, with their brothers and sisters? I'll bet it's no better than yours or ours.

"One Thanksgiving, when Robin's children were still young, one of them was pouting about not having any friends at school and I said, 'You want friends? Do something friendly. You want to be liked? Do something likable. You want to be loved? Be lovable. Pouting at Thanksgiving while some people have nothing is not very likeable.' Robin scolded me for 'blaming the victim.'

"'If a child can do no wrong,' I said, 'it will do no right.'

"What's funny about this is that my other daughter, Melanie, is so happy. Her children are fun, we like her husband, the whole family is a joy to be with. She was a great kid, and she's grown into a successful, happy, busy adult. We raised her exactly like Robin. Go figure."

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Jim Mullen is the author of "It Takes a Village Idiot: Complicating the Simple Life" and "Baby's First Tattoo."




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