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May 20, 2013
Melissa Healy: Genetic copies of living people from embryos no longer science fiction
Jewz in the Newz by Nate Bloom : Jews Inducted into Rock Hall of Fame; Anton Yelchin co-stars in New "Trek" film; Kutcher (but not Kunis) visits Israel; Jewish TV Star Praises Jewish Rap Star
The Kosher Gourmet by Cathy Pollak: WARNING: This WALNUT CAKE WITH PRALINE FROSTING, perfect for afternoon coffee, is addicting
May 13, 2013
Rabbi Nathan Lopes Cardozo: Why the giving of the document that would permanently change the world could only be done in desolation
David G. Savage: Church-state, literally? Supreme Court weighing public school graduation in a church
May 10, 2013
Rabbi Berel Wein: Be all that you should be
May 8, 2013
Peter Ford: Why China is welcoming both Israel's Netanyahu and Palestinians' Abbas
Warren Richey: Obama administration quietly backs out of appeal over new contraceptive mandate
Fred Weir: At Kerry-Putin meeting, US-Russia relations thaw --- a tad
The Kosher Gourmet by Leela Cyd Ross : Almost too pretty to eat, this colorful salad with Sicilian inspiration will tickle the taste buds and delight your visual sensibility
May 6, 2013
May 3, 2013
Kids, kittens the Same? With employee perks at struggling Internet pioneer Yahoo! it's hard to tell
Sandy Kleffman: Artificial kidney offers hope to patients tethered to a dialysis machine
April 29, 2013
Roy Gutman: Poland's new Jewish museum celebrates life, doesn't revisit Holocaust
Mark Clayton: Terrorism in America: Is US missing a chance to learn from failed plots?
Kim Murphy: Boston Bomber's 'Svengali' Revealed
Pete Spotts: Tiny satellites + cellphones = cheaper 'eyes in the sky' for NASA
April 26, 2013
Clifford D. May: Defense in the Age of Jihadist Terrorism
Sharon Palmer, R.D.: How to feel your best -- with plenty of energy, a healthy weight and optimal mental and physical function -- without driving yourself batty
April 24, 2013
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Jewish World Review
Where's Gutenberg when you need him?
By
Jim Mullen
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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
I've heard for years that "no good deed goes unpunished," but it seemed like a clever phrase being passed off as wisdom, something you might get in a fortune cookie on an off night.
Now that I am trying to print 50 form letters at home on behalf of a tiny nonprofit for which I volunteer, I'm realizing the truth of it. What should have taken 20 minutes with my state-of-the-art computer and top-of-the-line printer and should have cost next to nothing is now on its third day, and the bills are mounting. Midway through the second frustrating day of trying to do this simple job -- using the new printer I had to buy after my old printer broke while removing a jammed envelope -- it hit me that I could have done the whole thing with an old typewriter in an hour or two.
Why, oh why, did I give away my typewriter 25 years ago? Because the paperless future was here, that's why. We'd never use paper again. Which is puzzling, because I buy paper five reams at a time now, something I never did when I typed. But with today's high-speed printers, it takes only 50 "Lost Puppy" posters here, a few hundred school play notices there, a few maps to grandma's new house, and suddenly I am Office City's new best customer.
Losing my old all-in-one printer, scanner and copier was traumatic. It was like losing an old friend -- a cranky, ill-behaved, tantrum-prone old friend, but a friend none the less. After five years, I finally had it working exactly the way I wanted -- except for color printing, which it refused to do unless I expected something to print in black and white. And except for the cartridges that seemed to run out exactly when I was in a rush to get something printed, and that cost more than the printer itself to replace. And except that it copied when I wanted it to scan, and it scanned when I wanted it to copy. And except for its inability to print envelopes without jamming.
But I loved that printer. When it finally breathed its last, I had three expensive backup ink cartridges left that will never fit any new printer. They will sit in my desk drawer beside cables and chargers for other devices I no longer own, adding to my cemetery of expensive, obsolete technology.
But there was good news. The new printer I just bought will solve all my problems. It is wireless and doesn't need to be tethered to my desk, so it will give me more desktop space. Sue and I can both use it from anywhere in the house. At least that's what it said on the box. All I had to do was install some simple software from the enclosed disc and I would be in printer mail-merge heaven.
And that is still the dream. At the moment, my computer shuts down every time I hit "print." I have installed a new driver, new firmware, new settings. I have even spoken to a Level 2 technician; still nothing. After two hourlong sessions, he promised to speak to a Level 3 technician and call me back. I think he was crying -- something about his wife and kids and his college loan. I didn't catch it all, but he sounded like a man at the end of his tether. I hope he gets help.
That was 10 hours ago. I'm still waiting for his callback. Maybe the company fired him because it cost more for him to help me on the phone than the company made from selling me the printer. From now on, every phone conversation with that company will be a money-loser for both of us.
I think I'll just take the printing job over to Office City and let them do it. I hear they give a break to nonprofits. I just hope doing a good deed doesn't put them out of business.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
Comment by clicking here.
Jim Mullen is the author of "It Takes a Village Idiot: Complicating the Simple Life" and "Baby's First Tattoo."
Previously:
You are what you watch
Today's special: Cacophony, with a side order of the flu
His and her movies
WARNING: The local gym may be hazardous to your health
The Starbucks Gap
Meat-free holiday about as happy as a heart attack
All I don't want is another gadget
We went to the fiscal cliff and all i got was this stupid t-shirt
Some years, you just want to stay home
The first Thanksgiving family feud
Spamming the globe
Suburban mall is an endangered species
Worthless heist: Only in the world fine arts
The debate debate
Looking for a shortcut to penury? Buy a car
The pros and cons of a chicken tattoo
Does saying 'no' make us bad grandparents?
Crying 'foul' over ballpark proposals
College loans and job-search groans
That buzzing you hear is the sound of time flying
Too much of anything can get annoying
Five billionth in line for the throne
WARNING! This article may cause drowsiness
The mail and email of the species
Jotting down the un-bucket list
Bees deliver stinging fashion critique
Have a tissue issue? Help is a phone call away
My guy's guys are better than your guy's guys
Divorce, Facebook style
Millionaires are a dime a dozen
What not to name the baby
Technology is a wonderful thing -- when it works
A bad case of the wedding bill blues
Of cupcakes, teenage moms and crazy nuptials
FOOD FIGHT!
Rolling Stoned
Caterwauling over death of books is premature
Ask your doctor if this column is right for you
Could shopping be any more inconvenient?
Thanks for the lack of memories
Help wanted: Teenage life coach with all the answers
Sorry, wrinkles are not legal proof of age
Dead mice tell no tales
GOING PAPERLESS -- PRICELESS!
Should bad behavior be rewarded?
The perplexing problems of the rich and famous
Do these glasses make my gut look big?
More expensive by the dozen
In one year and out the other
Thank heaven it's Black Friday
Planning for the long term ---- tomorrow
READING THIS WILL MAKE YOU THIN AND HAPPY!
The Seven Secrets of Success
It's tough living off the gridIt's tough living off the grid
How not to clean the houseIt's tough living off the grid
The yellow badge of cowardice
Any way you slice it
Home sweet homeschooling
Don't Head for the Borders
Money ball
Golf and death go hand in hand
Tune in, turn off, unplug
The radar curtain
Is Steve Jobs clouding my privacy?
The gift of garbage
Johnny Intern, Ph.D.
Twenty-foot fences make good neighbors
You must remember this…
TV experts and real news
Hey caller, where's the fire?
My sad cushy life
Pacemaker, don't you mess around with me
Big Brother is skinny
Flight of the snowbirds
This HDTV needs child support
Dear Future: Where's the dome?
Not so elementary, my dear Watson
A vacation revolution
Your call is very unimportant to us
Life: There's no app for that
Bam! Practical kitchen magic
Poisoning myself
Ban Huck Finn in schools --- even the sanitized version!
$38,000 for traffic and weather updates
2011 Predictions: Nostradamus was a hack
2010: A year of annoying junk
Why do bad things happen to stupid people? Moving on from movie theaters
Money never sleeps, but it does pass out
President Trump kept it classy
Stalking your college kid won't change a thing
Putting my life in Jeopardy
Mo' government, mo' problems
iLostIt
Dressed for excess
Expert tease
The mysteries of Jersey
You are a toilet, where am I?
Don't we all cheat at the game of life?
What happens when I forget where Google is?
Don't let the doorman hit you on the way out
Picasso fiasco
Purple (hair) Daze
Let me hear your body talk
Working from work
Babies deserve clean restrooms, too
3-year-old bear-killers are a thing of the past
Money-making ideas on the fly
Collecting and hoarding
Chain of fools
Please come pick up your acting awards, ESPN commentators, you've earned them
You've been superpoked by the U.S. gov't
e-Readin', e-Writin' and e-Rithmatic
A pose by any other name
Warning: Column contains 2010 spoilers
He loves only gold, only gold
Think about direction, wonder why …
Flushing your money down a diamond-studded toilet
More like wack Friday
The good, the ad and the ugly
The desert of the real
Let books be large and in charge
I was insulting people way before the Internet
GPS drill sergeant: Left, right, left!
Butterfly in the sky, you make winds go twice as high
Music to my ears it's not
You don't light up my life
Fair or not: Country living is far from Little House
A parable for the ages
Top 100 Cable news stories of the century
Green dumb
A developing story
Thinking outside the lunch box
What's good for the goose is good for the scanner
Newspapers will survive, but network TV?
A really big show of generation gaps
When pigs flu
The reports of our decline have been greatly exaggerated
Mergers and admonitions
Invest in gold: little, yellow, different
Stuck in Folsom Penthouse
Collecting karma
Setting loose the creative juice
It's all in the numbers
You're damaging your brain with practical skills
The real rat pack
The unspeakable luxury of the Park-O-Matic
Gross-ery shopping
© 2009, NEA
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Arnold Ahlert
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Stratfor Briefing
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Ben Stein
Mark Steyn
John Stossel
Cal Thomas
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Bob Tyrrell
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George Will
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Byron York
ZeitGeist
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Robert Arial
Chuck Asay
Baloo
Lisa Benson
Chip Bok
Dry Bones
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Everything's Relative
Mallard Fillmore
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Tech Q&A
Mr. Know-It-All
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On Nutrition
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