There's a reason I've been feeling down: Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD).
According to About.com, this woeful malady is triggered by the overcast
winter weather. As it goes, a lack of exposure to sunlight can cause higher
levels of melatonin and lower levels of serotonin. That can cause depression-like
symptoms.
Grogginess is a common one. And, boy, since Democrats took over the White
House, House and Senate, have I had trouble getting out of bed in the morning.
Their pork-packed "stimulus" bill has kept me fuzzier than ever. It became
immediately clear that many Democrats care less about solving our economic
crisis than they do exploiting it to spend billions on pet projects that have
little to do with jump-starting the economy.
It's also clear that Obama is already having trouble reining in Democrat
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and the left flank of his party.
The more I think about it, the more I pull the covers over my head, which is
surely a result of my SAD disorder — a disorder that is causing me to
suffer other common symptoms, such as a craving for carbohydrates.
Obama promised us change. He promised the most ethical administration in
history. He promised not to hire lobbyists.
But already he's appointed 17 lobbyists. And, one by one, his Cabinet picks
are turning out not to be terribly ethical. They've exploited their political
connections to make huge dough. They skipped paying their taxes in a manner
that would send the rest of us to the klink.
If Obama's team is doing such a horrible job vetting its nominees, I worry,
where else are his people screwing up? National security? And what if nobody
pays the electric bill and the White House lights are shut off?
The more I worry about it, the more I crave linguini with olive oil and
garlic and a fat loaf of Italian bread smattered in butter. My craving is surely
a result of my SAD disorder — a disorder that's causing me to suffer another
SAD symptom: irritability.
I surely hope Obama succeeds — or, to be more precise, I hope he implements
the right ideas and policies so that my country will succeed, but I worry. I
don't like his idea of making government "cool again" when what we need is
to make government small again.
His eagerness to push through the pork-packed stimulus bill — his use of
words such as "catastrophe" and "disastrous" to frighten us into supporting it
— shows me he's headed in the wrong direction.
A president should lead us toward a solution — bring out the best in us to
confront and resolve our problems — not tell us how much worse things will
be if a bunch of hack politicians don't loot the government treasury to pay
off their pals.
The more I worry about it, the more irritable I get. No wonder I snapped at
the drive-through-window kid because he didn't scrape the onions off my
burger. My irritability is surely brought on by my SAD malady — a malady that is
causing me to suffer other painful symptoms, such as interpersonal
difficulties and sensitivity to rejection.
Sure, I'm worried about the coming days and weeks. Just as our country needs
to unify most — just as we need sensible government programs that unleash
the ingenuity and productivity of the American people rather than dampen them
— I fear we're going in the opposite direction.
If this stimulus bill goes through, largely unchanged, I fear Democrats will
be just getting warmed up — that they'll soon pass into law other
wrongheaded, giant-government programs that could take us years to correct.
Thinking about our future has left me so insecure, my interpersonal
relationships are suffering. I smiled at my friend's baby and the kid cried. I
reached out to pet my dog and he bit me. So sensitive was I to these rejections, I
gorged on pasta, snapped at family members and slept for days.
I'm relieved to discover that my symptoms are a result of Seasonal Affective
Disorder. The dreary winter weather is the source of my woes.
Boy, could I use a long, sunny day about now.
