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Nov. 6, 2009
Rabbi Berel Wein: Choosing to hear
JWisdom.com Zero to 1/60th: How to Empower An Hour with Gavriel Aryeh Sande (7 minutes)
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Suzanne Fields A Fallen Wall for Fallen Man
Nov. 5, 2009
The Kosher Gourmet: Three scrumptious -- but simple -- butternut squash dishes
JWisdom.com Hidden Hints: Unlocking Faith & Prayer with Rabbi Jay Yaacov Schwartz (10 minutes)
Nov. 4, 2009
Tom Hamburger and Kim Geiger: Should prayers be covered?
JWisdom.com When God played peacemaker With Rabbi Sroy Levitansky (5 minutes)
Nov. 3, 2009
Martin Peretz: Beware, Barack. Beware, Rahm. Beware, Axelrod
JWisdom.com Are you are closet idolater? With Sara Yoheved Rigler (10 minutes)
Nov. 2, 2009
Paul Greenberg: The Holocaust is now on Facebook
JWisdom.com Abraham's Strange Change With Rabbi Yitzchok Fingerer (5 minutes)
Oct. 30, 2009
Rabbi David Aaron: Secret to Immortality
Caroline B. Glick Silencing dissent in America
Oct. 29, 2009
Lini S. Kadaba: Do tactics avert flu or reduce humanity?
JWisdom.com We Must Revamp our Religious Vocabulary With Gavriel Aryeh Sanders ( 10 minutes)
Oct. 28, 2009
Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Atheists in Bubbleland
JWisdom.com Why what we wear impacts who we are With Rabbis Mordechai Becher, Menachem Golberger and Aliza Bulow ( 10 minutes)
Oct. 27, 2009
Paul Greenberg: The United Nations Is Outraged Again, Or: Department of Mideast Static
JWisdom.com The Science of Love With Rabbi Jonathan Rietti ( 7 minutes)
Oct. 26, 2009
The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Damaging disclosures with a twist
JWisdom.com Wisdom and Wonks With Rabbi Eytan Feiner ( 7 minutes)
Oct. 23, 2009
Rabbi David Aaron: Are you ready for the ultimate pleasure?
JWisdom.com Watermark and oneness with Rabbi Sroy Levitansky ( 4 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick Stop using limited powers in a way that expands our enemies' advantages over us
Oct. 22, 2009
Steven Emerson: Terror Cases Share Desire to Kill Americans
JWisdom.com No More More Family Fights --- Really? By Sarah Chana Radcliffe ( 5 minutes)
Oct. 21, 2009
Tonya Alanez: Holocaust denier sues survivor, calling Auschwitz memoir 'vicious lies'
JWisdom.com Meditating Jewishly: A Panacea for Success by Sarah Yoheved Rigler ( 7 minutes)
Oct. 20, 2009
Dennis Prager: Obama and Dalai Lama: Why Israel Worries about U.S. President
JWisdom.com Abraham was not religious By Rabbi Yitzchok Fingerer ( 6 minutes)
Oct. 19, 2009
JWisdom.comWhy Good People Do Bad Things By Rabbi Eytan Feiner ( 7 minutes)
Oct. 16, 2009
Rabbi Yonason Goldson: The Perfect Number
JWisdom.com Hearing Voices By Rabbi Sroy Levitansky ( 5 minutes)
Caroline B. Glick How Turkey was lost
Oct. 15, 2009
Jeff Jacoby: Peace vs. the 'peace process'
JWisdom.com: Former MTV producer and stand-up comedian Rabbi Lawrence Hajioff: Taming a Control Freak (A VERY fast 15 minutes)
Oct. 29, 2003
Mortimer B. Zuckerman: Graffiti On History's Walls (MUST-READ!)

Jewish World Review Feb. 14, 2008 / 8 Adar I 5768

A developing situation

By Malcolm Fleschner


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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Like most new parents, in five years of fatherhood I've become acquainted with many previously unfamiliar parenting concepts including, but not limited to, proper car seat installation, Wiggles Mania, "stroller envy" and pretending to make a big deal when someone else uses a toilet.


Another concept I've become familiar with is the notion of "developmental milestones." This is the term psychologists use for those childhood breakthroughs that overjoyed parents race for the camcorder to get on tape, such as when a child says "Mama" for the first time, learns to use a cup, takes those first tentative steps, finally moves out of the house at age 32, etc.


By contrast, when I was growing up, the primary developmental concept we had was called "going through a phase." The "phases" in question typically involved some sort of childhood behavior that the parents couldn't wait to end, such as the "throws tantrums in the supermarket aisles" phase, the "cram every small object he finds up his nose" phase and the "keeps hot wiring the neighbors' cars" phase. What I loved about the "He's just going through a phase" approach to parenting was that it could be used to explain away virtually any obnoxious, antisocial or downright illegal behavior. Suffice it to say that some of the kids I grew up with were able to smoothly transition from "going through a phase" during childhood into "doing a stretch of time" as adults.


Currently our household's developmental focus is on our 19-month-old son, Rafferty. His latest discovery is the word "hot," which he now uses with the irritating frequency of a recently accepted Mensa member steering the conversation toward the topic of IQ. Rafferty's obsession with heat likely stems from an incident when my wife or I may have given him a slice of pizza that was, in fact, a little too hot, and ever since he acts highly suspicious whenever we hand him anything.


So now, whether it's a banana, a popsicle, the front door, Grandma - whatever comes near is automatically met with a wary, "Hot? Hot?" These days my wife and I spend much of our time debating with him about whether various items are hot or not. I suspect this is what it's like hanging out with Paris Hilton.


Then again, I could just be misinterpreting his meaning, and he's merely concerned that everything in our home is stolen. The next time he asks whether his yogurt is "hot," maybe I'll be able to calm him down by showing him the supermarket.


Rafferty's other big development is a love of books. Until recently he routinely ignored our efforts to read to him, a circumstance that caused my wife no end of worry. She lives in constant fear that he will grow up to be a semi-literate lummox - the kind of guy who wears his baseball cap backwards, regularly demands high fives and refers to everyone, whether friends, coworkers, teachers, parents or the Pope, as "Bro."


At one point I tried to put her fears to rest. "You know," I told her, "I wasn't read to all that much as a kid, and look how I turned out."


For some reason she found this less than reassuring.


Then again, my limited exposure to books during my early years can be directly attributed to my mother, who never exhibited much interest in reading children's books to my sister and me. When I mentioned this to Mom during a recent visit, however, she took offense.


"What are talking about?" she asked, indignant. "I did read to you kids. I read you that Goodnight Moon book. Once."


Frankly, Mom may have had the right idea. Since Rafferty's awakening to the world of books, my wife's concern has turned to exasperation. The problem, as many parents of small children will recognize, is that he likes to have the same books read to him over and over again. As an adult, reading a book more than once can be an enriching exploration into the wonders of great literature. By contrast, most books directed at a 19-month-old audience are not exactly James Joyce, depth-wise. That's why no one ever says, "You know, I've read 'Pat The Bunny' dozens of times and each time I get something new out of it."


And so, while Rafferty's calls of "More, more" are adorable following the first few times through "The Little Engine That Could," after about 30 readings, I'm often tempted to hurl the book out the window and tell him, "Oh look, the little engine could fly too!"


I don't, of course. That would be bad parenting. So instead, after multiple readings of the same book, I instead encourage his new interest with a little hip lingo. "Wow," I'll say. "this book is really hot." Why he never wants to keep reading after that remains a mystery.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

JWR contributor Malcolm Fleschner is a humor columnist for The DC Examiner. Let him know what you think by clicking here.


Previously:

01/30/08: I can tech it or leave it
01/02/08: Confessions of a coke addict
01/02/08: Our bills are due
12/13/07: Going (to lunch) once, going twice…
11/28/07: Out with the old
11/06/07: My latest pet project
11/06/07: Can't tune it out
10/23/07: Something special in the hair
09/12/07: Can I have your attention, please?
09/12/07: Houston, we have an image problem
08/21/07: In the heat of fashion
08/09/07: Let's get in the game
06/13/07: You gonna eat that?
05/08/07: That's disinter-tainment
05/02/07:You Are (not) Getting Sleepy...
04/18/07: No time like Father Time
03/15/07: Deface the Nation
03/08/07: More gifts? You shouldn't have
02/22/07: Relationships can be such a chore
12/05/06: Who's calling the shots?
11/09/06: I'm taking selling to a whole new level
10/27/06: Some skills are beyond repair
10/18/06: You can't tech it with you
10/04/06: Award to the wise
08/24/06: Phrased and Confused
08/09/06: We're Gonna Party Like it's $19.99
07/19/06: Just Singing in the Brain
05/24/06: Who says you can't go home again?
05/11/06: When nightly news stories go off script
04/26/06: Cents and sensibility: A thought for your pennies
03/16/06: The day the Muzak died
02/23/06: Checkbook diplomacy begins at home
02/15/06: Today's toys: Where learning means earning



© 2006, Malcolm Fleschner

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