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May 21, 2012

Mark Clayton: Cybersecurity: How US utilities passed up chance to protect their networks
Howard LaFranchi: NATO summit: Who will foot the bill for long-term Afghanistan security?
Chris Farrell : Earn Dividends in Emerging Markets with This WisdomTree ETF
James K. Glassman: 5 Stock Picks Among Online Retailers
Stephen Whiteside, Ph.D. : Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: Social anxiety disorder --- or just shy?
Guy Jackson : Victim's father regrets death of Lockerbie bomber
The Kosher Gourmet by Mario Batali: Famed chef's veal shoulder farsumagru: A festive meat course for late spring
May 18, 2012
Rabbi Berel Wein: Striving: The People of the Book's Book for (All of) the People
Caroline B. Glick: Embracing dangerous delusions and not our friends
Steven Goldberg: 5 Great Stock Picks and the Exchange-Traded Fund that Owns Them
Janet Bodnar: How to Teach Kids to Handle Credit Cards
Mary Pickett, M.D.: Ask the Harvard Experts: Don't be forced into gluten-free lifestyle based merely on a doctor's false-positive test
The Kosher Gourmet by Carolyn Malcoun: DIY healthy lunchbox treats: HOMEMADE FRUIT BARS for kids and brown-bagging adults alike
May 17, 2012
Warren Richey: Teacher fired for being unwed and pregnant can sue religious school, court rules
Josh Mitnick: Netanyahu's 'centrist' coalition is already proving it's anything but
Steven Goldberg: Earn Dividends in Emerging Markets with This WisdomTree ETF
Mary Beth Franklin: Retirement Savings Tips for New Grads
Amina Khan: Research links coffee to lower death rates
Chelsea Sheasley: Social media: Is it too feminine?
The Kosher Gourmet by Faith Duran : Cheesy Potato Breakfast Casserole with Cheddar and Sun-Dried Tomatoes
May 16, 2012
Jackson Holahan: The Aleppo Codex
Jonathan Tobin : Iran Declares Victory in Nuclear Talks
Anne Kates Smith: 7 Stocks That Let You Sleep Tight
Carmen Terzic, M.D., Ph.D. : Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: A variety of exercises can help improve balance
Melissa Healy: National strategy on Alzheimer's disease aims to halt it by 2025
The Kosher Gourmet by Joyce White : GOODNESS GRACIOUS: GREENS! 4 winning recipes that are no longer just for down-home folks (Includes expert tips & techniques)
May 15, 2012
Dennis Prager: God and Man at (and for) Liberty
Kristen Chick: Obama administration resumes arms sales to Bahrain despite serious unresolved human rights issues. Activists feel abandoned
Pat Mertz Esswein: Homes are now affordable again and mortgage rates are low. What you need to know before you buy
Kathy Kristof: Our Practical Investor Fights Inflation with These 6 Investments
Sue Hubbard, M.D.: The Kid's Doctor: Lactose intolerant young child? Check again
Environmental Nutrition Editors: Get the facts on palm sugar sweetening
The Kosher Gourmet by Kathy Hunt: Spread a Little Excitement with EXOTIC CONDIMENTS (4 RECIPES)
May 14, 2012
Richard Simon: Purple Hearts for domestic terror victims?
Nando Pelusi, Ph.D.: The privacy paradox: Surrounded by strangers, we risk isolation, anxiety
Chris Farrell: Investing Lessons from the Great Recession
Lisa Gerstner: How to Protect Your Identity, Finances If You Lose Your Phone
Harvard Health Letters: Heart disease and dementia
Tiffany O'Callaghan: New hormone mimics effects of exercise without the sweat
The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon: MANGO COCONUT OAT MORNING MUFFINS are a bright but hearty delight
May 11, 2012
Rabbi B. Shafier: Why happiness will always be elusive
Charles Krauthammer: Echoes of '67: Israel unites
Howard LaFranchi: With G8 snub, US-Putin 'reset' off to stumbling start
Jeremy J. Siegel: Investors, Relax About Rising Interest Rates
Jessica L. Anderson: Get the Best Deal on a Used Car
Jett Stone: Forget face-lifts and fake knees. Scientists have seen the fountain of youth --- and it's broccoli
The Kosher Gourmet by Chef Mario Batali: The famed chef's vegetable dish that tastes true to the season: FAVAS AND SUGAR SNAP PEAS WITH POTATOES AND TARRAGON
May 10, 2012
Clifford D. May: The Real Palestinian Refugee Problem
Sergei L. Loiko: Putin sends warning to U.S., NATO in Victory Day speech at Red Square
Mary Rourke: How being a 'mentch' got Vidal Sasoon his start and fighting in Israel's War of Independence provided him with confidence and a strong sense of his own identity
Harvard Health Letters: Palliative care: Underused therapy yields surprising benefits
Jeff Bertolucci: Get Home Phone Service for Less Than $10 a Month
Rachel L. Sheedy and Susan B. Garland : Make the Right Moves to Boost Benefits
The Kosher Gourmet by Betty Rosbottom: Gleaming with its golden, crimson, and snowy white hues, this silken smooth and creamy STRAWBERRY ORANGE TRIFLE looks impressive, but is easy to prepare
May 9, 2012
John Rosemond: Parents, stop destroying the American male
Valerie J. Nelson: Maurice Sendak, author of 'Where the Wild Things Are,' dies at 83
Bob Frick: Angst Over Annuities
Sharon Palmer, R.D. How you can reduce your risk -- or delay -- chronic diseases associated with aging
Howard LeWine, M.D.: Ask the Harvard Experts: Why did my blood pressure suddenly shoot up?
Lisa Gerstner: Lower the Rate on All Your Loans
The Kosher Gourmet by Emily Ho : Springtime soba with miso sauce offers a coloful mix of fresh textures and flavors
May 8, 2012
Edmund Sanders: Netanyahu suddenly cancels new elections, forms unity government
Frank J. Gaffney Jr.: Farewell to European superstate
Anne Kates Smith: 4 Stocks That Mimic Buffett and Berkshire Hathaway
Gaia Vince and Clare Wilson The Rise of Miniature Medical Robots: Fantasy Fast Becoming Reality
Paul Takahashi, M.D.: Mayo Clinic Medical Edge: Never suffer night leg cramps
Jessica L. Anderson: Extended-Warranty Warning
The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Celebrate National Chocolate Chip Day with the Best Cookie Ever (Includes techniques)
May 7, 2012
Mark Clayton: Homeland Security warns major cyber attack aimed at gas pipeline industry underway
Angus Roxburgh: Putin Decoded: World view of a Russian feeling dissed
Kimberly Lankford: Navigate a Course for Long-Term Care
Kevin McCormally How to Adjust Your Tax Withholding
Celeste Robb-Nicholson, M.D.: Harvard Health Letters: How do you treat a Baker's cyst?
Joanne Capano: Healthy Snacks for Children: The Choices May Surprise You
The Kosher Gourmet by Penelope Wall: Classic Creamy Spinach Dip with a Fraction of the Calories and Fat
May 4, 2012
Rabbi Nathan Lopes Cardozo: Holy 'trivialities'
Jonathan Tobin: Bibi v. Barak will be no contest this time around
Steven Goldberg: Blue Chip Stocks On Sale Worldwide
Art Pine Slow Productivity Growth a Blessing --- For Now
Sue Hubbard, M.D. : The Kid's Doctor: Are Kids Too Wired?
Kerri-Ann Jennings, M.S., R.D: Foods that are good for your smile
Amy Paturel, M.S., M.P.H.: Eating Well: Foods that are good for your smile
The Kosher Gourmet by Betty Rosbottom: Strawberry rhubarb parfaits are elegant yet simple to assemble
May 3, 2012
Michael Freund: Who's Afraid of the Messiah?
Clifford D. May: The Foggiest War
Susan B. Garland: Insurance to Cover Old Old Age
Steven Goldberg 6 Reasons to Bet on a Big Bull Market
Harvard Health Letters: Treating prostate cancer --- no rush to judgment
Larry Gordon: Harvard, MIT partner to offer free online courses
Naomi Nix : Man gets free trip to Chicago after postcard sent by mother in 1957 finally reaches him
The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Intensely Italian vegetable frittata is a seriously simple standby


Jewish World Review Feb. 21, 2007 / 3 Adar, 5767

Suicide, soiled diapers, and Botox: Welcome to politics, American style

By Jackie Mason & Raoul Felder


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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Like a baby's dirty diaper, hypocrisy and duplicity soils the Democratic majority in Congress, and like the diaper, the closer you get to it, the worse it smells.


In the vote on the non-binding resolution to oppose President Bush's request for a troop surge in Iran, the overwhelming majority of the Democrats — both in the House and the Senate — voted time after time to fund the war in Iraq. Imagine if you opened a restaurant and had the group of financial backers who enabled you to open the restaurant blame you for opening the business in the first place! Or imagine if someone bought the gas for your car and then they blamed you for trying to drive someplace in the car! The Democrats were Bush's partners in this war from the very beginning, and yet now blame him for the results of the war. Why doesn't Bush blame them for funding the war?


The Democrats have no conscience or moral purpose whatsoever. They are worse than mere hypocrites. They are accessories to the murder of American troops. By not approving of a mission that they have funded all along, they are revealed for what they really are — a group of cowards whose actions are demoralizing the troops and encouraging our enemies to kill more American soldiers. The fact that they are harming our troops' morale by playing into the hands of the enemy means nothing to these Democrats. The Democrats simply don't have the guts to vote to cut off the funding for the war, so they came up with this absurd resolution simply to humiliate George Bush.


It is as if someone wants to kill himself and a fellow on the other side of town pays for the gun and the bullets — and they he says it's someone else's fault the guy committed suicide.


The Democrats are more concerned with their political futures than anything else. They are emboldening the enemy by saying this is a worthless war. In effect, their actions will only result in the loss of more of our troops.


Let's consider the Congressional hearings confirming General David Petraeus as the top American ground commander in Iraq, and Petraeus argued vehemently for the troop surge, and the Democrats all voted for him and wished him the best of luck and success in his mission. Two weeks later say the mission is a total failure and a mistake, with no planning or ultimate objectives. Imagine if you had a fighter and you know that Mike Tyson will knock him out in the first round, but you go out and hire the best trainer, and wish him "Best of Luck" and tell him where to send the body.


What success do they wish Petraeus? If they think the mission is stupid, why do they need a brilliant man? Why do they want to watch something flop successfully? Why do they need a great general at all — why do they need the best man, if he will serve no purpose? Why should a man get paid for nothing? If the Democrats approve sending him on a worthless mission, then they are complicit in planning the murder of innocent people. If they had the courage of their convictions, they would have cancelled the mission. Why approve Petraeus in the first place?


Then there's the "Botox Babe" Nancy Pelosi's need for big airplanes. She claimed that it was "security people" who encouraged her to request a much larger airplane than the one used by her predecessor Denny Hastert. She couldn't identify the high level security people because it would endanger their own security. Maybe she asked her plastic surgeon who told her bigger is better. The truth is, size doesn't matter — at least that's what my brother-in-law says.


Then she said she needed the much larger plane because this country has a lot of enemies. But with her opposition to the war, what enemies is she afraid of? Given her stance on the war, our enemies are much more likely to send an army to protect her! Next she said she needed the larger plane because she is third in line for the Presidency. Didn't Denny Hastert know about this provision in the Constitution, or was there a new Constitution written just for Nancy Pelosi? If Pelosi were alive when the Constitution was written over 220 years ago, she probably would have asked for a bigger horse to drive her covered wagon across the country. Then Pelosi said she needed the bigger plane because she would not have to waste time by stopping for refueling. But if she cared about not wasting time, she wouldn't have run for Congress in the first place.


Finally, the very people who she said she required the bigger plane ultimately refused to approve the jumbo jet. What's going on here? Not to mention the fact that the bigger plane would have cost the taxpayers $300,000 for each trip from D.C. to San Francisco. Using the internet and a little advance planning, 1,000 college kids could fly from the nation's capital to San Francisco with the money that Nancy Pelosi would have spent on one trip on that big plane.


However, Nancy Pelosi is not so upset. She discovered a great plastic surgeon in Chicago, so it's not a wasted trip. Nancy Pelosi gets younger and younger. After looking 65 years old five years ago, after a few visits to the plastic doctor, she looked 38 years old. Now she looks about 17. She is the only person whose aging process goes in reverse. Things are moving around her face like the dancers in one of Prince's videos. Pretty soon there will be no neck left. Her eyes are moving in different directions. First she was looking younger than her daughter. Now she looks younger than her granddaughter. She won't be happy until she looks like an embryo! It almost makes us want to become pro choice.

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