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April 21, 2014

Andrew Silow-Carroll: Passoverkill? Suggestions to make next year's seders even more culturally sensitive

Sara Israelsen Hartley: Seeking the Divine: An ancient connection in a new context

Christine M. Flowers: Priest's execution in Syria should be call to action

Courtnie Erickson: How to help kids accept the poor decisions of others

Lizette Borreli: A Glass Of Milk A Day Keeps Knee Arthritis At Bay

Lizette Borreli: 5 Health Conditions Your Breath Knows Before You Do

The Kosher Gourmet by Betty Rosbottom Coconut Walnut Bars' golden brown morsels are a beautifully balanced delectable delight

April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Jan. 24, 2006 / 24 Teves, 5766

Uphill skiing won't catch on anytime soon

By Mitch Albom


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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Having just returned from a family ski trip, I would like to share the following tip: When skiing down a mountain, never leave anything important near the top, such as a pole or a loved one.


I learned this firsthand while skiing with my two young nephews, Jesse and Gabriel. They are decent little skiers, considering they live on the rock of Gibraltar, off the coast of Spain, where the closest they come to winter is putting ice in their Coca-Cola.


Anyhow, Gabriel, the younger one, is 12, still got the high voice, still waiting for his growth spurt. He is, in general, the cautious one. (His brother, who is 15, would strap onto a plane wing and call himself an astronaut.)


And there we were, in the Colorado Rockies, on a pretty steep slope. Slopes there are color coded, from easiest to hardest: "green" (you may live), "blue" (you'll limp), blue-black ("may we see your HMO card?") and "black diamond" ("pine box or oak?").


And we were on a blue-black.


Now, in general, I let the kids go ahead of me, then I ski down to them. But for some reason, this time, I skied ahead, enjoying the scenery. Then I stopped.


And I looked back up the mountain.


And there was Gabriel, a little speck.


And down he went.

AN UPHILL CLIMB
So I stood there, leaning on my poles, waiting for Gabriel to rise. But he didn't. And I waited. And I mumbled to myself, "La-dee-dah, get up, Gabe. Come on. Uh . . . GET UP!"


And after about 15 freezing minutes, I had one of those skiing epiphanies.


He wasn't getting up.


Which meant I had to.


Now, I don't know how many of you have ever tried to walk up a ski slope. It's damn hard. First I tried that sideways climb with my skis on. I took 4,000 steps, and when I lifted my head, I had ascended six inches.


So I took my skis off, pushed them down to Jesse, who had that pained look on his face, a look I imagine Cain gave Abel, and I said, "Watch my skis."


And he said, "Where are you going?"


I imagine he was asking himself why we really needed a little brother anyhow, couldn't we just move on with our lives as a slightly smaller family?


I, however, felt indebted to return to my sister both of the children I had borrowed that morning.


So up I went.

COMING TO THE RESCUE
Did I mention the altitude? This was about 10,000 feet, meaning I was gasping after five steps. Did I mention I wore a ski mask, ski hat and goggles, so every breath I took came back on me in a wet, snotty mess?


Did I mention that ski boots weigh like a million pounds, and that the incline was so steep, I only could dig my toes into the snow, not my heels?


Did I mention I was not happy?


I had to stop every minute or so, just to see if I had passed out. I was sweating and freezing at the same time. I don't know how long I climbed, but I did ask myself, several times, why my sister hadn't become a nun.


Finally, just a few steps before reaching my sweet little nephew, the ski patrol arrived with its sled.


And here I came, The Abominable Snow Uncle, collapsing to the ground. And the medics stared at me. And I could only wheeze, "He . . . he . . . my neph . . . neph . . . neph ..."


And Gabriel, in his high voice, calmly said, "That's my uncle Mitch."


In the end, he was fine, nothing broken. And the ski patrol took him down. And I was left behind, on the slope, with no skis. So I slid back to my other nephew — on my butt.


The morals of the story are: 1) There's a reason why they call it "downhill" skiing. 2) Next time, Jamaica.


Also, sisters should not have children.

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