Dean P. Johnson
A Trump/Knauss bridal registry — No, really!
http://www.jewishworldreview.com |
I suppose I should be grateful that my invitation to Donald Trump and Melania Knauss' nuptials must have gotten lost in the mail. A quick glance at their bridal registry shows their most expensive gift a Royal Copenhagen Flora Danica porcelain fruit basket for $8,500 from Bergdorf Goodman and one of the least expensive, a $65 coffee spoon from Tiffany's. That's a tall drink of champagne.
I did, however, receive this week two invitations to participate in lifetime milepost events of a two others.
The first was from a cousin announcing the impending birth of his first child and the day, date, and time of the baby shower. Included in the card was a shortlist of stores where he, his wife, and baby-to-be were registered.
I sat back and stared at the powdery yellow, green card in the shape of a teddy bear and began to calculate my cousin's recent life — engagement, wedding shower, nuptials, housewarming, and now, baby shower — each with its own lists of stores where the happy couple was registered for gifts.
By my count we had equipped their kitchen, filled their cabinets, decorated their bedrooms, practically furnished their entire home, and now we were about to all but deliver their kid and we still had to look forward to registries for the baptism and birthdays.
What once was a hand up for newlyweds who were foraging for twigs to build their love nest, gift registries have dovetailed into a matrimonial entitlement, payment for friendships and/or wedding receptions rendered.
According to a survey by Brides magazine, nearly all engaged women register for gifts, and of those, 93% expect the majority of their guest will purchase gifts from the registry.
While I understand the intention of the wedding registry, the whole idea has made gift giving obligatory and antiseptic. A gift should not only reflect the desires of the receiver, but the personality and affection of the giver as well. Where is the sentimentality of an uplift brushed stainless steel two quart tea kettle for fifty bucks, or a seventeen dollar nutmeg grinder, or, for that matter, a la Trump, a one hundred twenty dollar cheese knife from Christofle Perles flatware.
And even if some believe the bridal registry to be a home-starter necessity, registries have gone on vacation. There are now honeymoon registries where one can purchase the happy couple airfare, hotel stays and day excursions. Is this gift or graft?
Of course gift registries aren't just for weddings anymore. One can find registries preset for baby showers, bar/bat mitzvahs, commitment ceremonies, anniversaries, graduations, retirements, housewarmings, and birthdays, which gets me to the other invitation received this past week.
The second invitation sent to my house this past week was for a birthday party for a friend of my ten-year-old daughter stating that the minor missy was registered at a major toy store. Underneath the name of the store was a note: "Please use the registry as we do not have time to return duplicate gifts." I quickly RSVPed our regrets on behalf of our daughter.
When will enough be too much?
Will we soon be seeing divorce registries at law offices, liquor stores and gun shops?
There are plenty of wedding shower registries, why not some for the bachelor party from escort services, video stores and beer distributors?
How about other marked events like that first incarceration with registries for bail bonds, lawyers, and stationary?
Bankruptcy? See divorce.
What about a registry for that pinnacle of life events, death: funeral homes, florists, stonecutters.
I'm not sure of the purpose for a Trump/Knauss bridal registry aside from dues to an exclusive club.
A gift is a token, a gesture. Anything less is merely collecting inventory, void of the emotional connotations that adhere to the art of giving.
Just imagine the Magi carrying their gifts of gold, frankincense and a Cuisinart Grind and Brew automatic coffee maker.
JWR contributor Dean P. Johnson's columns appear in Los Angeles Times, New York Times,
Christian Science Monitor, Hartford Courant, St. Louis Post-Dispatch, San
Francisco Examiner, Newark (NJ) Star-Ledger, Atlantic City Press, Philadelphia
Inquirer among other smaller papers.
Comment by clicking here.
08/10/04: Will our evolving military finally change its recruitment campaign?
08/04/04: Advertising my family
07/06/04: What we need are laws protecting us from all the dangers of cell phone smoking
06/28/04: Now, they're killing the good ol' American backyard barbeque!
04/20/04: Once again, it's TV's fault
03/31/04: My kids have been watching the news again!
03/26/04: Why are we still annoying Americans with metrics?